


Hurt Less

by lesbianshipnation



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Canon Typical Abuse, Comedy, Enemies to Lovers, F/F, Fluff, I'm so tired of angst in this fandom, Slow Burn, Underage Drinking, more angst than i meant for it to be, so this is more lighthearted for the most part, some angst though
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2019-07-20
Packaged: 2019-09-23 06:42:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 39,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17075312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesbianshipnation/pseuds/lesbianshipnation
Summary: Catra's not going to give this field up without a fight.Catra transfers to a new school senior year with the rest of her foster home. As the new band president, she's not going to give up her field to a losing football team. Especially not one run by Adora.Jock/Punk High School AU





	1. Look What You Made Me Do

Today was going to be a shit show. Catra knew it would be the moment her alarm went off at quarter to five. Shadow Weaver ran a tight ship, and if you missed your shower time you were out of luck. And Catra was _always_ given the first shower time. Many would think it would be a privilege to go before the five other children, to have unlimited hot water. Catra knew better; she knew it was designed as a punishment since she hated getting up early. But here she was every day proving to her monster of a caretaker that she could do it, just to spite her.

That wasn’t the worst of it. Moving had been a huge pain in the ass for the misfit group of orphans. They were all piled into the minivan for their first day at their new school. This wasn’t a real act of caring, driving them to school. It was a short walk to school. No, gathering together in new clothes with their shiny new phones and getting dropped off was just good PR for Hoardak and his law firm. The second day of school they would be expected to walk or catch a ride. And Shadow Weaver never forgot the first day of school group photo for Facebook. Gotta prove they’re all still alive at least right?

But the absolute _worst_ of it was who would be at her new school. Catra was very aware that _she_ would be there. It had been almost a year since she heard from Adora. Catra wasn’t looking forward to seeing her. She would probably gloat about her new family, her new friends, her new life. Why did she need Catra when she had all that? Catra was only the best of a bad situation. Adora had made that perfectly clear. If Catra was lucky she could steer clear of her for her last year of high school. Then Hoardak would finance her college experience and she would be far away from Adora once and for all. It was a big school, it _had_ to be possible to avoid her.

One by one they got out of the car, preparing to face a new school. As Catra readied to get out of the crowded minivan, Shadow Weaver shut the door and locked it, looking in her rearview mirror. It was so like her to refuse to look directly at Catra. That could be mistaken for affection Catra supposed.

“It has come to my attention that _Adora_ is attending Bright Moon with you. You are to interact with her as little as possible. Adora has a loving family and impeccable grades from what I learned from my last email with her mother. We wouldn’t want to _ruin_ that _would we_?” It was not a question but a command.

“You don’t have to worry about it. I have no desire to even look at her.”

“Good. Let’s keep it that way.” The door unlocked and Catra scooted out, swinging her bag onto her back with one strap. Just like she thought, today was going to be a shit show. Scorpia and Entrapta had waited for her. Entrapta was furiously tinkering with the new phone. Scorpia had a grin plastered on her face as she threw her bulky arm around Catra’s shoulder.

“Scorpia, personal space!” Catra hissed as she removed the girl’s arm.

“Right, sorry Catra! I’m just so excited! Aren’t you excited?!” Scorpia beamed as they made their way into the building.

“I’m excited to graduate. And I’ll be excited when this day is over and I can sleep.”

“Entrapta, are you excited? This is going to be so much fun!” Scorpia seemed to ignore Catra’s obvious desire to end the conversation as they made their way to the guidance office.

“I’m _very_ excited! I get to take some advanced engineering classes this year and some software classes! Plus this new phone appears to be quite customizable! The only downside is our guardians have locked the cabinet with the coffee in it…” Entrapta looked momentarily disappointed. Catra didn’t want to imagine Entrapta with any more energy than she already had.

“I heard there’s a soda machine! I can help you find it later! This is going to be so much fun, I can feel it! Like the time we got to go on a boat!” Catra couldn’t suppress a sigh. Scorpia seemed to be excited by _anything_ these days. Catra remembered their boat ride as being filled with nausea and fear. Plus being near their captors for more than an hour at a time would make anyone want to vomit.

 

Catra survived her first three classes. Scorpia nominated her for band president; it wasn’t an idea she particularly _hated._ Now she had to prepare a speech by the end of the week, which was the last thing she needed. Plus there was little hope of her winning as a transfer student. At her old school, she would have been a shoo-in. No one would have blinked twice at the thought.

Thus far she didn’t mind her schedule. Music theory, advanced guitar, and band were all up her alley. She groaned as she walked to her last class of the day: Gym. Catra couldn’t help but kick herself for putting it off until her final year of high school. The thought of getting into shorts and _sweating_ was disgusting. She had suffered through her other required gym class with Adora during their freshman year. She shook herself at the thought of her former best friend. Maybe if she was lucky the gym teacher would let her run laps instead of playing a team sport.

She stuck to her routine. She hid in a stall and waited until everyone else was gone before changing. The last thing she needed was girls accusing her of staring at them. Being out had a lot of disadvantages, the locker room being one of them. She waited about ten more minutes than she should have, sitting in the stall. She could just cut class, but Shadow Weaver would find out. If she started skipping on the first day of school she would never hear the end of it.

She waltzed into the gym, waiting for the gym teacher to yell at her. The kids had already broken up into teams for volleyball. She gazed over at the game as the meek teacher _asked_ her to be more punctual next time. She barely heard any of it as she saw _Adora_ spike the ball over the net. Adora had gotten _buff_ since she had last seen her. She had also shaved the sides of her head. Catra’s fingers felt numb and she stood there trembling. Adora didn’t notice her as they continued the game. _Of course, she doesn’t even see me._

“Catra? Why don’t you join the game? You can be on the side closest to us,” the teacher lightly put her hand on Catra’s shoulder, bringing her back to reality. Catra nodded vaguely before getting into the position the teacher had pointed to. _So much for avoiding her._ Catra cursed her bad luck and prayed she could keep her cool.

Adora’s eyes grew wide. She stood completely still as Catra put her hands on her hips. One of her teammates gave the ball so Catra could serve. She could see Adora’s jaw go slack, then break out into a wide smile.

“Catra?!” Adora nearly squealed. Her excitement was over the top. It was so _very_ Adora to pretend she missed her.

“ _Hey, Adora,_ ” Catra couldn’t hide the smirk. She tossed the ball into the air and jumped up, slamming it down. It collided with Adora’s face. Catra couldn’t contain the amusement she felt as several others ran to check on Adora. Blood poured out of Adora’s nose as she clutched her face. It made Catra’s day 100 percent _better._


	2. Try Harder

“She didn’t do it on purpose,” Adora sighed. She held the tissues to her nose in the back seat of Bow’s car, praying it would stop soon. It had been a fountain when she first got hit, but it had slowed considerably since going to the nurse. 

“No, she definitely meant to. I was  _ there  _ Adora,” Bow commented, putting his blinker on. 

“No! I’m telling you guys, Catra has always been terrible at sports. She was aiming for something else!” Adora scoffed. If there was one person Adora knew, really  _ knew _ , it was Catra. Catra had been terrible at every sport except gymnastics since they were old enough to walk. Catra hated team sports so much she had run laps every day in their freshman gym class to get out of it.

“Well, tell her to be more careful! She could have broken your nose!” Glimmer seethed in the seat next to her. 

“She didn’t mean it Glimmer!” Adora didn’t know how to drill it into her adoptive sisters head. She loved her new friends, she truly did. But they saw the black clothes and the rough around the edges personality and just assumed they could read Catra. Reading Catra was an art, something that took years of practice. Adora could read every lip twitch, every muscle flick on Catra’s face. “I won’t lie, she is  _ mad  _ at me,” Adora admitted. She hated the thought of it. It had been eating her alive for a year. 

“Yeah, she looked  _ pretty  _ pissed,” Bow nodded to himself as he put the car in park. Everyone grabbed their bag and got out of the car, slowly making their way to the house.

“I’m going to smooth things over. I finally have a chance to talk things out with her!” Adora huffed, but she  _ was  _ thrilled to see Catra. It had been the only thing missing from her life since she was adopted. And it had been a huge hole that couldn’t be filled with new friends or new found popularity. She would find herself  _ wishing  _ Catra could be there. She would laugh at something and think about how much Catra would love it. It stung that they had parted on such horrible terms. Adora knew it was partially her fault, that there were things she had said that could never be unsaid. But all she wanted was her best friend back.

“That’s the spirit, Adora!” Bow threw his arm around her, squeezing her. 

“I wouldn’t get your hopes up if I were you. She’s mad at you for getting  _ adopted _ ,” Glimmer retorted. Glimmer had been this way since Adora had explained the situation to her months ago. Adora knew she was just being overprotective. Glimmer didn’t like that Catra had hurt her new sister so badly. Adora didn’t have the heart to tell Glimmer she hadn’t told her  _ everything  _ about her parting with Catra. If Glimmer knew some of the things she had said she would look at her differently and Adora didn’t want to lose another person close to her.

“She just needs some time to cool off. I’m sure she’ll come around!” Bow was supportive as always. Glimmer fiddled with her keys until she got the right one and opened the door. Angella wasn’t home yet; she usually got home around four on school nights, not wanting them to be alone too late. There was a plate of brownies on the counter which she had no doubt snuck a vegetable of some kind into. Adora didn’t mind, anything was better than Shadow Weaver’s cooking. She knew it angered Glimmer to no end. If Glimmer wanted to eat vegetables she would just eat the damn vegetables. Adora and Bow grabbed several each and made their way for the couch, throwing their bags down as they did.

“I just have to figure out some way to get her to talk to me….” Adora muttered, biting into a brownie. She couldn’t think of anything since they only had gym together. She knew Catra would hate it if she cornered her in the locker room. And in the middle of gym class was even less preferable. Everyone would be able to hear what would no doubt end up being a fight, at least at first. 

“You could try some kind of peace offering!” Bow suggested around his brownie. Glimmer threw herself into the armchair and rolled her eyes. She started scrolling on her phone aggressively. Adora wished Glimmer would help even just a little bit. She had to know how brokenhearted Adora had been for an entire year. 

“That could work….” Adora hummed. She did still have some things she had bought Catra for Christmas. She hadn’t mailed them because she was afraid Catra would send them back or worse, Shadow Weaver would take them. The box was still under her bed. She knew Catra never locked her gym locker; it was a habit she had fallen into when they were in middle school. A dangerous one that Adora had chastised her for, but a habit that would be to Adora’s advantage. 

  
  


Adora waited all day for gym class to roll around. The box in her backpack felt heavy, even if it wasn’t much of a difference when she thought of all the heavy textbooks she carried. She supposed the thought of putting it in Catra’s locker was what was weighing on her. She got to the locker room comically early. She gently placed the box in Catra’s locker, adjusted the ribbon just so. Double checked to make sure the note was secured safely. She didn’t know why she was bothering. Realistically, Catra was just going to throw it all in the trash the moment she realized who’s handwriting it was. Catra might even taunt her about it later, throw her heartfelt gesture in her face. It wouldn’t stop Adora from trying, nothing ever did. 

Dodgeball. Once it was a game that Catra loathed. That’s how Adora remembered it. In middle school, hell even the first two years of high school they spent together. Catra was never terrible at it. Her speed was something Adora had always envied. But Catra never seemed to genuinely enjoy the sport, or any sport really. Today Catra was  _ different.  _ For one thing, she could move like no one Adora had ever seen. No one could hit her throughout the game. Adora didn’t remember her being so muscular. It wasn’t the same kind of muscle Adora had, it was lean muscle. Catra moved like a dancer in and out of her classmates. Adora couldn’t compete, Catra’s team winning every round. By the end, Adora was in a puddle of sweat, panting heavily. All the while, it looked like Catra barely broke a sweat. Adora wasn’t surprised that Catra had taken every opportunity to hit her with a ball and by the end, she was sore from all the hits. 

Adora still pushed herself to run up to Catra as they headed for the locker room. She ran to Catra’s side, trying her damnedest to make it look effortless. She was certain everyone could see her struggling. She just hoped Catra didn’t notice or point it out at the very least.

“ _ Hey, Adora _ ,” Catra’s voice is dripping almost, “A bit out of shape are we?” Adora couldn’t tell if she was teasing or not. 

“Ha-ha, very funny. When did you get so good at dodgeball? You were amazing.”

“Oh, Adora. Did it ever occur to you that I  _ let  _ you think you were better at everything?” Catra let out a sharp laugh and sauntered away. Adora couldn’t quite pinpoint what emotion she was struck with, but it stopped her in her tracks. 

“Hey, what was that all about? What did she say?” Bow had caught up with Adora just before she got to the locker room. 

“I think I’m going to have to try a hell of a lot harder,” Adora muttered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo, I did it! You have all been so nice, it made it so much easier to write the second chapter! Thank you all so much for your support!!!
> 
> Chapter 3 is already planned. I'll start working on it soon since I have some days off for the holidays!


	3. Cut Me Loose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Abuse mentioned, not depicted

Catra was having a pretty good week. Thus far her classes are going well. She’d been elected band president, which was a surprise. And the gym was becoming a place of absolute joy for her. By Friday she had wiped the floor with Adora in volleyball, dodgeball, and soccer. Her last class of the day was a place she could take out all her frustration and anger. It was becoming therapeutic to see the disappointed look on Adora’s face. Although it was annoying that it only comes when she toys with Adora. Adora wasn’t used to losing, so Catra thought it would bother her to no end. It angered her that Adora seemed impressed by her. It angered her more she craved Adora’s attention.

Catra wasn’t about to ruin her mood by opening the box and note Adora had left her in her locker. She had nearly kicked herself for not locking the damn thing.  _ Of course _ , Adora would remember something as small as that. Shadow Weaver would call it being “detail oriented”. Catra would call it being anal. She let the box sit under her bed and had no intention of touching it. She wasn’t going to let Adora ruin her few joys at this new school. She intruded on her thoughts enough as it was.

Catra had even managed to find someone in the band she didn’t completely hate. Of course, Scorpia was there in the flute section, Kyle was with the clarinets, and Entrapta played the xylophone. Catra was looking forward to being away from them. Entrapta was the closest to the bass section, so she occasionally bothered Catra. Since the school was medium sized, Catra was the only bass clarinet player and she was seated next to the only baritone saxophone, a girl named Mermista. Mermista had been elected as band vice president, much to the girl's dismay since she didn’t run for any position. She had let out a loud groan when it was announced, followed by an exasperated “fine”. 

Catra knew she had a lot of work to do for the band. For starters, they only had a couple weeks until the homecoming game. The music teacher was also fresh out of college and had never taught a class full of rowdy teenagers before. It was good and bad at the same time; the teacher had no idea what she was doing, but that meant she was more inclined to listen to Catra and not fight her. Plus Catra knew Kyle alone was going to be a struggle to teach some good moves to. Not to mention when he played that thing it sounded like he was murdering a peacock. And keeping Entrapta on-topic was difficult plus Scorpia told the same three stories on repeat. But Catra had marched with a much worse group before, so she could turn these losers around. 

Catra stood at the podium waiting for everyone to sit down with their instruments, Mermista at her side, scrolling on her phone. She didn’t know how much help this girl would actually be, and almost wished they had elected Scorpia for the position instead.  _ Almost.  _ It couldn’t be any worse than when Lonnie had been in the band back in the day and had annoyed the living shit out of her. Catra was grateful every day that Lonnie had quit for rugby when they were freshmen.

“Alright, listen up. We’re already going to look like a total joke because our football team hasn’t won a single game  _ ever _ . We don’t have much time to get this routine down, so we’re going to meet after school. We’re meeting tomorrow, no exceptions. Bring sneakers, no sandals  _ Kyle _ I’m looking at you. Scorpia is passing out the sheet music, practice  _ every night _ . Tomorrow I’m going to assign practice buddies, you’ll have someone to practice with inside the auditorium during class, we’ll do rotations. Any questions?” Catra leaned away from the podium and waited. Everyone nodded, so she made her way back to her seat. Mermista right behind her. Mermista slumped into her chair before grabbing her instrument. 

“Hey Mermista, we have to meet to talk about the plan for band.”

“Ugh, I guess. After school?” Mermista droned.

“Can’t today.” Catra had to attend the once a month dinner with Hordak and the baby. Shadow Weaver would kill her if she wasn’t there to suffer through it. 

“Saturday?” Mermista lazily turned the sheet music to the right page.

“I can’t, tomorrow after rehearsal?” 

“Fine,” Mermista stared into the distance like everything was killing her. Catra could sympathize. She only hoped Mermista could get her shit together for the sake of the class. The last thing she needed was a band that looked and sounded like ass.

 

Normally when people hear the phrase “that time of the month”, they think of the menstrual cycle. Catra thought about that, but she also thought about the once a month dinner where Hordak and the baby actually came home before everyone was in bed and had dinner with all of the foster children. It was usually the second or third Thursday of the month, but it often varied depending on the activities at the law firm. Nevertheless, Catra dreaded its arrival. It meant all the children dressing in their best clothes, something Catra found subjective and helping set the table in a frenzy. Shadow Weaver would pretend to cook the dinner when in reality all her cooking was so horrid Scorpia usually did it instead. Catra was grateful for that; at least Scorpia knew what spices were. Why did white people not use spices? 

This time Catra  _ had _ to behave. For multiple reasons but she had to behave nonetheless. It had become painfully apparent that the band was short on funds. Her teacher had confided in her that the school had taken the budget for new football gear, which made Catra's blood boil. Of course, they would take something from a healthy, even thriving program and give it to Adora and her group of losers. All schools cared about were roided out jocks who could make them look good by getting full scholarships to  _ prestigious _ universities. She wasn't surprised because it had been the same at their last school. But if she wanted to get supplies, that meant playing nice with Hordak. He was completely in charge of the checkbook, not to mention he was more apt to listen to her than Shadow Weaver. 

" _ Well _ , doesn't someone look nice," Lonnie's voice was seething with suspicion. Her brow was raised as she helped Catra set the table, something Catra almost never helped with. Catra had avoided picking any of her typical clothing because she knew it would cause a problem with Shadow Weaver, the last thing she needed tonight. It made Catra feel uncomfortable to be in church clothes. 

"I'm going to pretend there was a compliment  _ somewhere _ in there," Catra ground out. 

"Y-you do look good Catra! You clean up nice!" Kyle was trying to be supportive, she knew this. She wasn't in the mood for his pity at the moment, even if he looked just as uncomfortable as she felt. 

"Shut up Kyle. No one asked for your  _ fucking _ opinion," Catra hissed. She went back to laying down the final placemat and grabbed some coasters. Everything she was doing was just minimizing risk. Shadow Weaver was extra vile whenever her husband was home. Everything had to be perfect or she would lose her damn mind. Catra wasn't sure why as they didn't even seem to like each other. On the contrary, they seemed to hate each other. Hordak spent most of his time in the office and didn't even trust his own wife with their only child, opting to bring the child to work with him every single day instead. Catra couldn't blame him for that one, if Shadow Weaver treated that baby even remotely close to how she treated her foster children she couldn't fault him. Child services would actually care if the only kid related to him died.

Catra heard the door open and she knew immediately who was home. He always slammed the door when he came in, most likely because he didn't like to make more than one trip so he carried a baby car seat, his briefcase, and other assorted things he needed to work from home. Catra often wondered why he even bothered coming home at  _ all _ . He owned the law firm and could stay overnight if need be. He had proved that when he and his wife got in a fight after Adora was adopted because Shadow Weaver was  _ adamant _ about adopting her instead. Catra had been sure she was going to die that night when Hordak left because Shadow Weaver was  _ crying _ . She had never heard that woman cry in the nearly eighteen years she had been in her care. She doubted she ever would again. That night Catra had surprisingly been on that hags side. 

Catra straightened her back as Hordak entered the room, carrying the little imp they had the nerve to call a baby. All the other children had fled the room, opting to be with Shadow Weaver in the kitchen. Catra preferred to stand her ground in the dining room. Hordak at least didn't hate her, not outwardly anyway. Catra wasn't a fool like Adora, she knew Hordak had no good intentions. But he was neglectful at worst and right now he was the best of a bad situation. She felt almost frozen as he lifted the baby into his high chair. He sat at the head of the table and looked at her expectantly. She sat in her assigned chair, pushing her nerves down. 

"Catra, you're looking well, very put together," Hordak remarked.

"It merely  _ proves _ my theory that she is capable of looking like a  _ proper lady _ ," Shadow Weaver hissed as she entered the room. She went over to her husband and gave him the ceremonial kiss on the cheek, which he would lean into. The other children piled in as Catra contained her retort, putting the food on the table. Scorpia put her bowl down and excitedly went up to the baby. Scorpia was probably the only one other than Hordak that liked that brat. 

"Timmy! It's so good to see you, little buddy! Are you going to eat some food like a big boy today?" Scorpia stole the seat next to him. She always liked to feed him for some reason. Catra had tried once and he had just spit it at her. That little demon saw Scorpia and his whole face lit up. He tried to reach for her immediately, making a series of incomprehensible baby noises and squeals. She put the bib on him, which looked absolutely ridiculous in her massive hands.

"He's always thrilled with your afternoon video calls, Scorpia," Hordak gave something that was vaguely a smile. It hadn't gone unnoticed by the others that since Adora left, Scorpia had taken the role of the favorite. Probably because she was actually good with children. 

They loaded their plates and waited. If anyone tried to eat before Shadow Weaver said so they would be in trouble. Everything had to be almost in sync. Shadow Weaver said grace (which was  _ hilarious _ since they only went to their very Catholic church on Christmas and Easter) and once she was done they all started to dig in. Catra knew the questioning about school would start any moment, but she was too hungry to resist Scorpia's cooking. It smelled like heaven, and Scorpia put the foods she knew Catra would like towards her. 

"How are your studies?" Hordak feigned interest, as always. As long as none of his foster children weren't failing he couldn't care less. Shadow Weaver, on the other hand, wanted all of them to score high marks like Adora because it made them look better. 

"I'm taking some interesting engineering classes this semester," Entrapta replied. Entrapta still wasn't used to talking to their caretakers, being the newest orphan added to the menagerie. 

"I'm taking a ton of AP classes," Lonnie contributed. She looked overly proud of herself. Kyle and Rogelio mumbled something about their classes, while Scorpia enthusiastically talked about her cooking class for a few minutes. 

"And you Catra?" Hordak looked expectantly, like a general waiting for a status report from his solider. 

"I like most of my classes," Catra didn't want to go into too much detail. She knew the moment Scorpia's face lit up that she couldn't stop her from blurting out something that was supposed to lift Catra up. 

"She got elected band class president! She's so amazing!"

"Y-yeah, she's running everything really well! She's been really on top of things!" Kyle offered. Catra glared daggers into both of them, a plea to drop it. 

"It's amazing that someone as  _ uninspired _ as Catra could get elected to any kind of leadership position," Shadow Weaver retorted. Catra clenched her fist under the table, so hard she was nearly crying. She  _ had _ to behave. She just had to. 

"Leadership will be good for you, Catra. It will help you prepare for college," Hordak commented. 

"She's already doing an amazing job! She's choreographing the routine for the homecoming game coming up!" Scorpia exclaimed, wiping some baby food off of Timothy's face. Catra made a note to scream at her for this later. 

"You'll have to send me a video of the performance." Catra knew that Hordak didn't give a rats ass about what they were doing for artistic endeavors. Entrapta was one of his favorites because she wanted a science degree. Hordak cared about orphans getting steady well-paying jobs that would make him and his wife look better. He had been pressuring her and Scorpia to apply for some kind of undergraduate program that could gain them entry into law school. She knew that was never going to happen. 

Catra nodded and got back to her food. This night was almost over. Hordak would retreat into his study, where she could discuss funding. Shadow Weaver would go upstairs to drink some wine and not leave her room. The kids were expected to clean up after dinner and then head to their rooms to study. It was almost done and then she wouldn't have to do it for a month. And at least the next time she wouldn't have to be on her best behavior. 

But as Catra was giving herself a pep talk internally, the unthinkable happened: her phone started  _ vibrating _ , pressed against the table, creating the most god awful noise. She froze, the panic building in her. Shadow Weaver caught her gaze and she knew she was finished. This was not going to end well. She fumbled as fast as she could for the button to silence the ringing.

"P-probably just a scam caller," Catra muttered. 

"I get at least five a day," Hordak nodded. He seemed pacified, but she knew Shadow Weaver wasn't. 

"Catra, you'll see me after dinner. The rest of you, please clean up and get to studying." 

"Yes, ma'am." 

 

 

Catra knocked on the study door cautiously. She heard a muffled "enter" and turned the nob on the door. Hordak had a glass of brandy on his desk, his laptop open, law books strewn across the surface. He had his reading glasses on; always working but never happy. That was one thing Catra had known about Hordak since she was a child, he was never happy. Never happy with his job, his wife, his foster children, even his real child. All that money couldn't seem to satisfy him. The only time she had seen that man happy was when he had brought her and Adora to "bring your daughter to work day" and he had won a case for some scummy looking man who was  _ clearly _ in the mafia. She remembered how scared the witness he had cross-examined looked. It was something she would never forget.

"What do you need Catra?" Hordak didn't even bother to look up at her. The baby stirred, asleep in the car seat. She prayed he wouldn't wake up because if he started screaming Shadow Weaver was bound to seek revenge. 

"So, Mr. Hordak, as Scorpia told you I'm president of the band. My teacher told me that they took the budget this year for the football team, and I was wondering-"

"How much do you need Catra?" There didn't appear to be any malice in his voice. It wasn't exactly easy to tell with him. 

"We need $500, for dot books. Otherwise, Kyle is going to keep messing the steps up." 

"Alright, I'll have my assistant bring the check to the school tomorrow. Anything else?"

"No, thank you, sir," Catra turned to get out of the room as quickly as possible.

"Oh, and Catra?" She paused in the doorway, "Don't forget to cover those bruises with makeup in the morning. If you don't have any, Lonnie has some." 

"Yes, sir." Catra slunk back to her room, being particularly careful around Shadow Weaver's door. She closed her door gently and slid down the door. She took out her phone to see what stupid spam number had caused her so much pain. It was a number she didn't recognize, but the area code was similar to hers and there was a voicemail. She put the phone to her ear and slumped against the door.

"Hey, Catra! I-it's me, Adora! I just  _ really _ wanted to talk to you. Um..... I, I  _ really _ miss you. I know you don't want to talk right now but I know we can work this out. I hope you got the present I left in your locker. A-anyways, I hope you're having a good night! I'll see you at school tomorrow. You can text this number back if you want, or call! Or um, FaceTime if you have an iPhone? Anyways, I would love to talk to you-" The message got cut off after all the pausing that Adora did.  _ Fuck _ , with just a few dumb words Adora could turn her into a total mess. Catra  _ knew  _ that. So she didn't know why she started crawling on the floor until she was close to her bed. She didn't understand why she grabbed the box. She understood even less why she opened it. 

The box had some glittery tissue paper, probably whatever  _ Sparkles _ there had leftover from some birthday party. Catra slowly peeled back the layers. There was a smaller box and what appeared to be a shirt. She took the small box out and tossed the lid. There were three little metal charms: a bass clarinet, a bass guitar, and a baritone horn. All the instruments Catra played. She unraveled the t-shirt and it had a bass clarinet on it and the phrase "spit happens". It almost made Catra laugh. Almost. Under the shirt was some old pictures of them. Catra looked so happy, smiling ear to ear. Some of them Adora looked nervous; those ones she knew Shadow Weaver was probably taking the picture. Others she looked just as happy as Catra, gripping her around the waist. The picture that hurt the most was from their sophomore year. They were both all dressed up for a dance, a dance Adora had  _ begged _ Catra to go to. Tears started slipping down her face. She threw her phone across the room, cursing Adora. 

How could Adora just  _ leave _ her? After everything, after every laugh, every touch, every tear? How could she just walk away? Catra knew the answer; to Adora she was  _ nothing _ . Leaving her was just leaving an old childhood friend, like throwing out a stuffed animal you had outgrown. It wasn't like that for Catra. Catra knew. Catra knew the first year of high school that she didn't see Adora as a friend anymore. By their sophomore year of high school, she knew she was in love with her. Unfortunately for her, Adora didn't love her back. And as she curled into a ball on the floor, she reminded herself that she never would.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God this came out angsty. I promise most of this fic isn't going to be this angsty. Please review, I've felt really insecure about my writing this week, which is one of the reasons it took so long for this chapter to come out. Thanks so much for reading!


	4. You Don't Have To Be A Bitch About It

"Hey, _Adora_ ," Catra smirked. She stood with her hand on her hip, the whole band behind her. This was going to be fun. Catra had been looking forward to this all day.

"Catra? What are you guys doing here? It's the football team's day to use the field," Adora's brow furrowed in confusion. She took off her helmet, getting a better look at Catra. Adora had gotten taller, even if only by an inch or two. Catra could tell she was trying to tower over her. It was _cute_ that Adora thought that would work on her.

"Oh, Adora. No, it's not. Didn't you hear?" Catra handed Adora a piece of paper, "The principal is giving us the field for the day."

"What?! You can't do that, the homecoming game is coming up soon!" Adora huffed, speed reading the paper.

"Come on, Adora. We all know that the game is going to be a blowout, _again_. We need the practice to make you look _less_ pathetic."

"We're going to win this time! We have Lonnie now and we've been working our asses off!" Adora took a step towards Catra, obviously annoyed.  _Good, that's what you get. It's your fault I got my ass beat_ , Catra thought. It was her fault she had been an emotional wreck the night before. Adora was going to get _everything_ she deserved. Catra would make damn sure of it.

"Well, we're not breaking any rules. So, get your asses off my field." To Catra's surprise, Mermista walked up beside her. Her arms were crossed, but she seemed to be backing her up. At least with her presence. At least she was good for something, because Adora took a step back, even as her football lackeys were coming up behind her.

"Fine. Come on guys, we're going to run laps. You're going to have to share with the cheerleaders. They always practice in the corner when we have the field." Adora stomped off.

"Thanks, Princess, have a nice run!" Catra couldn't suppress a laugh. Catra turned back to her classmates, "Alright, into positions. We're going to start from the top. Entrapta lay down the beat! And _don't_ get distracted."

 

Catra didn't know _why_ she was so annoyed. Kyle wasn't doing as bad as she thought, everyone was looking pretty good on her end of things. But the _fucking_ color guard and the _fucking_ cheerleaders. They looked like toddlers. The imp Timothy was more coordinated than they were. It left her fuming. Of course, Twinkles was head of the color guard and crop top was head cheerleader. They couldn't even be bothered to put in the slightest bit of effort and it was driving her up a wall. That kids' back handspring was sloppy, a complete joke. It didn't matter if the band looked immaculate, if she drilled the routine night and day if the rest of halftime show looked like this. Her blood was boiling as she held her clipboard.

"Hold this," she spat, shoving the clipboard into Mermista's hands. She stomped towards the front corner towards the bleachers, shoulders tense. It was time to start a riot. Catra doubted any of Adora's new friends would fight her back. It wasn't like her old school, where fights were common and everyone knew better to pick a fight with any of the foster siblings. Here they were too busy getting their unicorn frappuccinos and singing kumbaya.

"Hey, Arrow. Could you maybe _suck less_? I'm tired of watching you bring us down."

"I don't think you could do any better." Catra was surprised by the light sarcasm. But she loved a challenge.

"You," she pointed at the guy who looked like he was a drag king in a pirate costume, "Get ready to catch me."

"Yes, ma'am! Adventure!" He shouted enthusiastically, throwing a fist into the air. With Catra's luck, this buffoon would drop her, but he had the most muscle on the team. If there was one thing Catra knew how to do, it was show off. So when she heard all the "oohs" and "ahhs" as she tumbled across the field and flew through the air she knew she was making herself perfectly clear. There was nothing special about Adora's new friends. When she landed on her feet on top of the guy's hands, she basked in their looks of total shock. But the best part was Adora, who had stopped running in the background. Her jaw was slack, her eyes wide. Then Lonnie ran into her and she fell on her face. This was turning into a _great_ day.

Sea Hawk put her down on the ground and she waltzed over to the other boy and poked her finger into his chest. "Do it like _that_ next time, pretty boy." She turned and strode towards the band, who all started clapping and cheering. Mermista had her phone held up, with the happiest expression she had ever seen on the girl.

"Yes, girl! That is we do shit!" She put up her hand and Catra high-fived her with a satisfied grin. An ego boost was welcomed every now and again. Scorpia was jumping for joy in the background, exclaiming to other students that Catra was her best friend and that she was blessed to live with her.

"Alright, back into positions! And color guard, look alive! I don't want to show you up too, so if everyone could just _suck less_ , that would make my _goddamn day_. From the top, Entrapta!"

 

"Did you _really_ have to do that?" Adora huffed. She had insisted on following Catra back to the music room, despite Catra's best attempts to lose her. Catra shoved her clipboard back in her locker and started writing her notes for the music teacher to read later. Mermista was leaning against some of the other lockers, scrolling on her phone as if her life depended on it. Catra was grateful she didn't have to walk to Mermista's house since she was already sweatier than she liked. The damn heat still wasn't going anywhere despite it being September.

"Do what? I was just showing him how to do it correctly," Catra feigned innocence.

"Don't play dumb Catra. You were being kind of a bitch," Adora crossed her arms in protest.

"Crop top didn't exactly play nice back. Besides, I could have done way worse to him, _Princess_."

"Well, whatever you were trying to do, it didn't work. Now Bow won't stop texting me about how he needs you on the cheer squad," Adora huffed. _It did work then_ , Catra thought. Adora was annoyed and that was _exactly_ what she was going for. Maybe next time she would go for pissing off Sparkles instead. That girl seemed like she had some fight in her. Maybe she could get into a brawl as she did at her old school. Except she used to have Adora to back her up.

"Can you hurry up? I want to get out of these gross sweatpants," Mermista groaned.

"Yeah, sorry-" Catra noticed that Adora was saying it too and raised her brow. At least she was apologizing for holding them up. Catra swung her backpack over her shoulder and followed Mermista as they made their way through the school towards the parking lot. For an upper-class neighborhood, Catra couldn't help but think how boring this school looked. Checkered floors and white walls, third rate guidance office, obsessed with their sports teams. They could have at least put in something worthwhile. A recording studio would have been cool.

The parking lot was thankfully pretty empty. Catra was getting tired of interacting with people. She couldn't wait to crawl into her bed; if she was lucky Shadow Weaver would put her dinner in the fridge and she wouldn't have to make any contact with her for the day. Catra doubted she would be so lucky, she would probably get home and Shadow Weaver would lecture her for not coming straight home. Mermista headed to one of the only cars left in the parking lot, a bright blue sports car. Of course, she was just another rich bitch, like everyone in their school was. Shadow Weaver wouldn't even let any of them go to driver's ed, let alone entertain getting them a car, not even one to share.

"Mermista, my sweet! You look as lovely as you did on the field!" Sea Hawk came around from the driver's side to hug Mermista, who instantly started to push him away. Her face was a bright red.

"Ugh, Sea Hawk get off! Just drive us to my house, please! Just get in the back, you guys!" You guys? Catra turned her head to see Adora was still standing there as Mermista got in the front passenger seat and Sea Hawk shut the door for her.

"What?! You're not coming!" Catra hissed, jumping back slightly. She would be damned if she just let Adora follow her wherever she liked.

"Uh, yeah I am. Sea Hawk drives me to tutor Mermista's cousin every Friday," Adora rolled her eyes and got in the back. Catra moaned as she went around to the other side. She threw her bag on the leather seat in between herself and Adora. Catra could feel every hair on her body prickle at the thought of being so close to Adora. She just had to make it to Mermista's house, then she could blow her off. She had some rich brat to tutor anyways, she wouldn't be in her business. Hopefully.

"You!" Sea Hawk shouted as he turned around to face Catra, "You were INCREDIBLE! You _have_ to join the cheer squad! You must be some kind of Olympic hopeful! I myself was once-"

"Ugh, Sea Hawk! Don't bother my friend, just drive me hooooome!" Mermista slumped until her head touched the dashboard, "But yeah, you were amazing. I took a video of you and put it on Instagram and it already has like two thousand likes."

"Uh, thanks. They wanted me to do the Olympics but it would have taken too much time," Catra rolled her eyes. She was hoping she could just end the conversation. Sea Hawk did have a huge soft spot for Mermista since he did what she asked almost immediately. Mermista basically had a chauffeur at her beck and call.

"They wanted you to be in the Olympics?" Adora whipped her head around to look at Catra, ponytail flying behind her. Adora's question stung. Poor, dumb Catra couldn't do anything right without Adora's help. Of course, it was surprising that she could accomplish anything without Adora holding her hand.

"Got offered every year in high school, just didn't want to do it. _Jealous_ Adora?"

"A little. You never told me-"

"You never asked," Catra turned to her, glaring. Adora took the hint that the conversation was over and turned away to look out the window. Catra thought that was a lovely idea, looking out into the neighborhood, avoiding her greatest enemy. It was easy to see why Shadow Weaver wanted to move to this part of town; PTA moms as far as the eye could see, most of them white. They looked like they all stayed home while their spouses attended to their every financial need. They probably spent half of that money in Homegoods. Plus Hordak was probably less likely to complain about "hoodlums" that he allegedly saw on his way home from work. Catra was surprised they kept her and Lonnie, especially when Lonnie got cornrows. Probably made them look better to have a little "diversity". Hordak could use it to deflect from why he had practically none at his law firm.

Catra would have much-preferred silence to Sea Hawk complimenting Mermista every other sentence. She supposed it was endearing. There was a time when she would have killed for a certain someone to be like that with her. She shoved the emotion down and tried to ignore them as best she could. It was an embarrassing display, and Mermista was clearly mortified. Catra couldn't imagine being bombarded with affection at all times. She understood why Mermista was basically melting into a puddle. She didn't think they were dating though; she had accepted Mermista's Facebook request and she didn't remember seeing her in a relationship. She did remember seeing a ton of pictures of smoothies and pictures Sea Hawk tagged her in.

Catra heard Adora sigh and she couldn't help but turn to look at her. Adora didn't notice her looking, keeping her gaze out the window. Adora had always sighed without realizing it, huffing at the slightest inconvenience. She also pursed her lips whenever she was stressed. Poor rich baby, it must be such a hard life being adopted. Catra would have thought Adora would be happier in her new life with her new friends and family. But she looked just as high strung as the day she had left Catra behind. Her ponytail was pulled so tight it was as if she was trying to scalp herself. Even her outfit looked like she was trying too hard, a button-up shirt tucked into some black jeans. Still as pretty as she remembered. Catra shouldn't let herself think things like that. She would just get hurt again, she reminded herself.

When the car finally stopped it was a large blue house. Mermista's parents had to be millionaires easily. Figures, Bright Moon High was full of that type of thing, trust fund babies just waiting for their parents to die or retire so they could take the family business. All the boats in the driveways suggested her family was involved in some kind of yacht business. Catra shuddered at the thought of liking being on any kind of boat. Rich people were strange. They paid all that money to risk a watery death. Watching Titanic had been more than enough when she was a kid.

"Mermista, my love, let me accompany you to the door-"

"No! Just, just drive home. And _don't_ set this car on fire. Your parents aren't going to buy you another one, not after last time." Mermista grabbed her bag and opened the car door.

"Wait, how many cars have you torched?" Catra couldn't suppress a laugh. Apparently, Mermista liked unconventional bad boys?

"That is a very exciting story!" Sea Hawk turned to obviously start telling the story.

"Three. One time we were in it. He's an asshole. Just go home!" Mermista slammed the door. Catra couldn't hold back a barking laugh as she grabbed her backpack and exited the car.

"I cannot wait for you to tell me that story!" Catra cackled. She caught Adora rolling her eyes as she took her duffle bag out of the trunk. Adora was a wet blanket 85% of the time when they lived together. Catra was going to assume that had gone up to 100% since she moved in with Twilight and her mom.

"Next time my limber friend! I must go back to my home to practice my moves until I am as accomplished as you!" Sea Hawk exclaimed from the rolled down window before slowly backing out of the short driveway, waving to Mermista as he left. Mermista's face was bright enough to light up the street as she walked up the steps of the deck. Both Catra and Adora followed closely behind as she opened the door. There were way too many nautical decorations. Catra understood that they made their fortune selling boats but they didn't have to make it a theme for their entire house. Every wall had a painting of a boat, there were seashells on every end table. Why did rich people waste their money on that kind of travesty? They couldn't afford a designer or something? Or worse, maybe a designer actually made this mess.

"You're late," a younger girl was glaring from her spot in an armchair in the living room. She had textbooks strewn about so Catra knew it was the brat Adora was going to be tutoring.

"Sorry, Frosta. I told you I had football today. Thanks for waiting," Adora tossed her bag down and started rummaging through it until she found her laptop.

"My aunt and uncle don't pay for excuses, they pay for results. Teach me calculus or I'll have them hire someone more punctual _and_ competent." Well, that was hilarious, this kid didn't fall over herself for Adora. Catra hid a snicker into her hand. At least in her new life, not everyone thought Adora was top dog. When they were growing up all the other kids had worshipped the ground she walked on, even stuck-up Lonnie. Maybe Adora was finally learning that she wasn't the golden child Shadow Weaver had constantly told her she was.

"Don't worry kid, I've got someone you can have as a backup," Catra laughed. Entrapta would probably love to make some extra money.

"Noted. Adora teach me functions now or that girl's friend is taking your job."

"Okay, okay!!" Catra laughed as Adora scurried to get a pen and paper. Mermista motioned to Catra to follow her upstairs. As much as she was enjoying the show and would pay to watch this middle schooler boss Adora around, she had work to do. Catra thought about counting all the boat paintings on her way up. That would be a great drinking game in this house. Catra was impressed with Mermista's room wasn't as tackily decorated.

"So band plans? I have like four face masks to do after this, so let's get going," Mermista droned as she started stripping her sweatpants off. Catra averted her eyes at just the wrong time. Did every girl at this school wear lace panties? Whatever happened to cotton? A trophy caught Catra's attention.

"You were in Uptown Surf? No way! I was in Horde Cadets!" Catra turned to see Mermista was in a pair of shorts, finally.

"Holy shit that was you! Your show was amazing last year! You play baritone horn right? I do too!" Mermista held out her fist and Catra fist bumped her.

"I can't believe someone at this terrible school was in drum corps! Surf's show was _killer_ , I thought you guys would beat us for sure."

"It was a close call for sure," Mermista flopped down on her bed and pat the spot next to her. Catra sat down, studying all the trophies.

"I got the teacher to order some dot books so hopefully we can turn this group around," Catra sighed.

"I took some notes on what you said to her, they're on my phone if you need them. We should get the woodwinds and the drums cleaned up. They look like garbage, but the clarinets and flutes sound the worst. You had a good idea about practice buddies during class."

"And here I thought you didn't care. We're going to destroy this half-time show. We're going to make them forget the football team is a bunch of losers," Catra snorted, "We can spend some extra time on them in class. Especially the clarinets, but I suspect it's 90% Kyle."

"Sounds rad. I'll text you if I think of anything else." Catra nodded and moved to get up. "You wanna hang? I have Netflix and Hulu up here. Frosta's a _real_ bitch if you interrupt her study sessions." Catra was taken aback. Was she making a new friend already? No one ever wanted to be her friend. They were usually forced to be because they lived with her, like Scorpia and Entrapta. Or like Adora.

"Yeah. Let's do it."

 

Catra hadn't had that much fun in a while. She had forgotten to check the time but by the time she was headed down the stairs, it was dark outside. She was going to walk home in the dark and if Shadow Weaver was still downstairs she was certainly going to get at least a stern talking to, if not a straight up beating. It was almost worth it though, with all the laughing over drum corps jokes. It felt like she had a real friend for once, not just a pity friend.

It was surprising that Adora was still there, wasting her Friday nights tutoring a kid instead of going to whatever rager she was probably invited to. But there she was packing up all her supplies at nearly 8 pm. Catra stopped at the bottom of the stairs, not by design but because Adora had decided to rush over to block her.

"Were you _really_ trying to give away my job or were you just teasing?" Adora was clutching her duffle bag like it was her lifeline.

"Like you need a job anyways _Princess_. What your new mommy doesn't give you a big enough allowance? Maybe you could try asking for an advance?" Catra smirked.

"Will you _stop_ calling me that Catra? Did you ever think maybe I'm not comfortable with them just giving me stuff? Maybe I want to earn my keep?" Adora had that look, the one she had when she thought about crying, but then pushed it back in. It made Catra's lip twitch.

" _Poor baby_." Catra pushed her way past her.

"Are you ever going to stop being mad at me?" Adora sounded like she was choking back the tears. Catra stiffened as she opened the door.

"No. Have a good night Princess."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo! This was not supposed to be this long. I hope you guys liked it!! Work's going to be a little hectic this week, so not sure when I'm going to post chapter 5. Have a nice week guys, do your homework!!


	5. Let It Be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adora just wants to talk but the words always come out wrong.

Adora's days always started the same. She woke up at quarter to five and started brewing a pot of coffee for Angella. Then she does a two-mile run around the neighborhood, races to get into the shower before Angella wakes up for work. Cleaning came immediately after; she had read something about successful people cleaning every single day, and since Angella was now a single mother of two it seemed more important than ever for Adora to pull her weight. She did all the laundry, wiped down counters, cleaned toilets. The only thing she didn't do was cook breakfast, but that's because she was certain to set off the fire alarm. Being a bad cook was something she had accidentally learned from Shadow Weaver but she couldn't seem to even get cookies right. She followed the instructions but it didn't seem to make a difference.

Angella always cooked breakfast for them, no matter how busy her day at the office was going to be. Angella was the director of the ACLU in their state, so she was constantly running around. Still, she made time for Glimmer, somehow adopted Adora, was trying to bring Hordak to court, and somehow got home by four every day to cook dinner. The least Adora could do was clean for her, go to the grocery store when she was able, and take care of Glimmer. That was the way she saw it anyway.

"Adora, I've told you before you don't have to clean the house like a mad woman. I can hire a cleaner like I _always_ have," Angella said as she pulled some muffins out of the oven. She set them on top of the stove and Adora took to pouring two cups of coffee.

"I'm not doing anything in the morning though! Besides, I'm just used to it I guess," Adora added the sugars to both of them before handing one to Angella. She hated the couple of minutes she had alone with Angella every morning. It wasn't that she didn't love her or that she wasn't grateful. It was that even after a year it felt strange for an adult to tell her she didn't _need_ to do so much. When she lived in foster care it was almost expected of her to read Shadow Weaver's mind. Otherwise, she and Catra were sure to get in trouble for some perceived slight. She wasn't exactly used to not receiving praise for what had always been deemed selfless behavior by her previous caregiver. She was even less used to almost being scolded for self-sacrificing.

"Well, you could always use more sleep. You shouldn't forget that you're growing. And with all the exercise you've been doing it's _especially_ important. Maybe you should talk about it with Dr. Razz this week." Adora could tell Angella got annoyed with her. Angella probably thought she was being stubborn. She wasn't trying to be, at least not intentionally. She was relieved when her alarm to wake Glimmer up went off so she could escape this conversation.

"Maybe I will. She usually has her own idea of what we need to talk about. I'm going to get Glimmer, she's nearly made me late the last couple of days," Adora smiled nervously before trotting towards the stairs with Glimmer's coffee. Her therapist was not conventional in any sense of the word and Adora could only assume it was common in Brightmoon. Glimmer had said something about having a similar one after her dad died.

"Alright, but this conversation isn't over, young lady. If we don't talk about this you'll work yourself to death," Angella sighed.

"Of course ma'am, we'll talk later I promise," Adora called down from the staircase. In truth, she hoped Angella would forget about it. In reality, she certainly would not. Angella could be distracted, but she would come back to topics eventually. She had seen this often throughout her year with Glimmer and Angella; it was easy enough to avoid or distract her, but you could not make her drop something that Angella deemed important. Adora supposed Angella was similar to Shadow Weaver in that way, although that was their only similarity aside from being women.

Adora stood outside Glimmer's door and rapped on the door with her knuckle. Hearing nothing she opened the door. Glimmer's room was a fairy princess wonderland. Adora remembered the first time she saw it and could almost hear Catra laughing from across town lines. When her own room had been nearly identical she knew she would have to do some redecorating. Adora didn't mind Glimmer's commitment to "aesthetic". It was charming, but only in small doses. It wasn't something she herself could look at every moment she was in her own room. She set Glimmer's coffee on her desk before standing over her.

"Last chance Glimmer. It's time to get up." Glimmer groaned and rolled the blanket into a cocoon. Adora sighed before ripping all the blankets off of her and jumping on the bed.

"Ugh! Why would you _do_ that?" Glimmer cried, hitting Adora with a pillow.

"Because you'll never get up if I don't!" Adora laughed, throwing one of Glimmers thousand pillows back at her. Glimmer fell back dramatically.

"Why can't school be later in the day? I love staying up late!" Glimmer whined.

"I don't know, there are like a million studies showing it isn't good for teenagers. Speaking of bad for teenagers, your coffee is on the desk." That made Glimmer get up and rush to start her morning chugging.

"I am going to need five more cups of this if I want to survive today. Catra is hell-bent on making my life hell so she's "inspecting" the color guard. Which I assume is just her telling us we're losers and showing us up."

"Yeah, probably. I mean, that _is_ her signature move," Adora sighed. She flopped back on Glimmer's bed. If Catra was here she would tell her she sighs too much. And that she's a horrible traitor who deserves to die lonely and painfully, probably in one of those machines from the Saw movies. Adora kind of agreed with her on both fronts.

"I still don't get why you care so much about what she thinks. She doesn't _seem_ that great to me," Glimmer seethed around her coffee.

"She was my best friend Glimmer. We grew up together, we have traditions! Like we went to dances together and watched Saw marathons every Halloween. I miss her, I _just_ want her back in my life."

"That sounds _more_ like a committed lesbian relationship than a friendship," Bow laughed as he stuck his head in the door.

"I totally agree with Bow."

"It's not like that. Glimmer, wouldn't you be devastated if Bow was as angry with you as Catra is with me?" Glimmer rolled her eyes at Adora before laughing.

"That would never happen. Bow and I are totally in sync."

"Could you just imagine it? Catra and I _used_ to be like that. Now she spikes volleyballs in my face every fourth quarter."

"Well, I know _I_ would be devastated. Which is _why_ I've been talking to Mermista and I think you should corner her," Bow suggested, "The band closet where they keep all the uniforms and shoes is a great place according to her. I bet you could catch Catra off guard."

"Catra would hate that..." There was nothing Catra hated more than being cornered. Except for maybe boats, Catra really hated all the boat trips they were forced to go on as kids. But Hordak insisted on being part of a yacht club for whatever reason. Probably yet another excuse to escape his horrible wife.

"Then you should definitely do it! She's been nothing but rude to you since she transferred. The least she can do is hear you out," Glimmer insisted.

"I'll take your suggestions into consideration, but I think wearing her down is the way to go. It always worked when we fought as kids. She just needs to be constantly reminded of how great we are as a team and eventually she'll give in and start leaving notes in my locker and stealing my fries like the good old days."

"Are you _sure_ you two weren't more than friends?" Bow raised his brow.

"I mean sometimes we were roommates but it wasn't romantic! She just liked to sleep with me."

"Oh my god, they were _roommates_!" Glimmer shared a concerned look with Bow before they were both giggling uncontrollably.

"Could you two stop referencing things? You _know_ I never get any of them," Adora whined. Shadow Weaver had always had complete control over the internet, especially when it came to Adora. She always told Adora it would corrupt her, teach her evil things. Living with Glimmer she realized she missed something wonderful growing up. No wonder Catra was always complaining about most websites being blocked.

"Sorry, Adora! Anyways, I came up here to tell you guys we need to get going!" Bow said.

 

 

Adora isn't quite sure how Glimmer had talked her into this, but she had. Glimmer and Bow wanted a big gettogether before going to the homecoming dance so they could get ready with all of their friends. Adora didn't know if her friends were oblivious or just cruel when they begged her to ask Mermista for them. They seemed to be blissfully unaware that Catra had been hanging out with Mermista often. Adora was sure if she tracked down Mermista in-between classes Catra was certain to be there with her. And she had been right.

Mermista started spending her breaks between classes in the band room with Catra. Perfuma had told Adora in a huff that it had been impossible to find her for a few days. Adora wasn't surprised to see Catra sitting next to her, feet thrown on top of a desk as Mermista scrolled on her phone. It made Adora feel uncomfortable just how at ease Catra was with Mermista after knowing her for such a short period of time. She had her casual smile out, the one she used to reserve for Adora. Catra was an extremely guarded person. Her just accepting Mermista as her friend seemed suspicious. Catra's whole demeanor changed when she noticed Adora. Her shoulders stiffened, her smile faded away. She looked hurt, like when Adora had told her she was leaving. It was quickly replaced by her signature cocky smirk as she tilted her head.

"Hey, Adora. Just can't stay away from me _can you_?" Catra's laugh was music to her ears.

"Psh, in your dreams Catra. I'm actually here to see Mermista."

" _Aw Adora,_ _you're breaking my heart_ ," Catra feigned disappointment, pouting as she crossed her arms. Adora smiled and shook her head.

"So what do you want?" Mermista looked up at her lazily.

"Glimmer wanted me to invite you to get ready for the dance with us. Bow and Perfuma are going to be there too, they said you can invite Sea Hawk if you want."

"Ew, why would I want _him_ there? I'll go if Perfuma is going," Mermista groaned before getting up, "I'm going to the bathroom. Don't kill each other while I'm in there." They were alone. It was all Adora wanted. Then why did it feel so weird? Why was her heart pounding, her anxiety out of control?

"We _really_ need to talk Catra."

"Do we? I think we've said enough personally, but if you want to keep going I'm all for sitting here and ignoring you."

"Catra, you're being ridiculous. I got _adopted_ , I didn't _want_ to leave you. I've missed you so much and now that you're here you just want to throw things at me. Can't we just talk this out?"

"Like last time we had a _real talk_ and you told me I was _unadoptable_? That went really well, maybe you have some other insults you want to throw around." Adora could tell Catra was getting angry. This wasn't what she wanted.

"I didn't mean it when I said it. It was a really shitty thing to say."

"It was a shitty thing to say. But you meant every word, Adora. I was always your charity case." Catra slammed her hands on the desk.

"That's not true! You're my best friend Catra! Why can't you just accept my apology like an adult?!" Adora was getting frustrated. None of what she wanted to say was coming out right. Catra knew how to talk about feelings. Whenever Adora tried she said things she didn't mean. Or she didn't talk about her own feelings, she just tried to look for solutions.

"Yeah, some best friend you are! Get it through your _thick skull_ Adora: I don't miss you, I _don't_ _like_ you. Go play adult with someone who gives a shit."

"You want to act like that? Fine, see if I care!" Adora was sick and tired of being the better person. That's what she always had to be with Shadow Weaver, with Lonnie, hell even with Catra. And she was so fucking sick of it. Maybe, just maybe it was time to give Catra a taste of her own medicine. She knew just what would piss her off as she stormed away.

 

 

"What are you doing here, Adora?" Catra stood at the edge of the stage in the auditorium, Kyle behind her desperately clutching a clarinet. Adora knew how much this was going to piss her off. It was almost enough to make her reconsider.

"My AP History class is here to study. What are you doing here Catra?"

"You can't be here. The band uses the auditorium for tutoring during class. Unless you want to hear Kyle honk, which I _guarantee_ he will. And the _squeaking_ Adora! You won't get much studying done with all that," Catra smirked.

"Actually the principal said we could have the auditorium from now on. Since we have exams to study for and all. You could always practice after school couldn't you?" Adora feigned innocence but she knew from Mermista that Catra and the band had a packed schedule. Not to mention there were rumors that Catra would be in charge of the jazz band and the pit for the spring musical. Adora could see Catra using all of her strength not to start a fight with Adora right then and there.

"Fine. If this is how you want it, Adora, you've got it. Come on Kyle, we'll use the closet." Catra stomped off with Kyle nearly tripping over himself to catch up to her. But when she could hear the clarinet shrieking from the closet it didn't chase her guilt away. She had thought this would make her feel better, but it didn't. It just made her feel hollow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! These last few weeks have been a lot! The angst is going to be winding down soon, I promise! I do have this fic mapped out so we'll be getting into some more pining soon instead of fighting.


	6. You're the Only One Who Can Up And Run

The garage was one of the only places the children were allowed in the house without Shadow Weaver watching them like they were still toddlers. As long as the minivan and the sports car weren't in it, they were allowed to be there. It was one of the few  _ generosities _ offered to them, but Catra couldn't blame them for only allowing them in there after what Entrapta had done to the basement. Everyone involved had gum in their hair and continued to find gum for the rest of the summer. Shadow Weaver had threatened to send Entrapta back to her previous foster home, which was cruel even for that woman. 

Outside of school the ragtag group of Catra, Scorpia, and Entrapta spent their time together in the garage, even when it was too cold to think. This afternoon was no different, though the afternoons Catra was able to spend with them were getting fewer and farther between. Catra was now somehow in charge of the jazz band and the pit for the spring musical which she apparently didn't have to start working on right away, but the teacher had obviously never directed a musical before. There was no way the band students who volunteered their free time could start in the spring and expect to be ready with all the other things going on. Allstate would be coming up in the spring as well, and most students who did jazz band or pit in addition to the regular band weren't going to miss out on Allstate. Catra knew she would have to start now, so most of her afternoons were completely booked. Plus Entrapta had some kind of robotics club going and Scorpia started a baking club, so they were less available. 

That afternoon was a particularly pleasant one. Shadow Weaver was at wine club, which meant she probably wouldn't be home until midnight or later. Hordak would be home barely before that, but that meant the children had the entire night without either of them. Hordak had even been kind enough to leave pizza money. He had no idea how much a pizza cost and left them several hundred so it was shaping up to a great day. Or it would have been if  _ Adora _ hadn't pissed Catra off so much. 

Entrapta sat at a workbench (which in and of itself was  _ hilarious _ because there was no way in  _ hell _ Hordak used something like that) tinkering away with a robot for her club. She had eagerly informed everyone it's was named "Emily" and no one had batted an eyelash. She was apparently taking it to a robotics competition in a few weeks. Scorpia was working on a recipe for her Home Ec class, drawing pictures of cupcakes and all three of them holding hands as stick figures in the margins. Catra was attempting to work on her Music Theory homework but all she wanted to do was punch Adora. She had broken about three pencils so far just thinking about it. She was getting nowhere fast, but thankfully she was decent at pulling classwork out of her ass. 

"You okay there buddy? You seem a  _ little _ tense lately," Scorpia had gotten up to come over to Catra, blatantly ignoring her personal space rules. Scorpia always did though, despite Catra's best efforts. She was a "hugger" so her standing at this distance was still better than pulling Catra into an embrace. 

"She  _ has _ been showing more symptoms of stress lately! I was hoping to get a sample of saliva if you don't mind Catra for one of my science experiments-"

"Absolutely not.  _ What the fuck _ Entrapta, I told you no bodily fluids," Catra growled. 

"I was hoping you would change your policy, I will make a note of it," Entrapta scrambled to find her phone, no doubt to record another audio of her repeating observations.

"Not that it's any of your business Scorpia, but  _ yeah _ I'm pissed. Happy?" 

"I'm sorry to hear that, is it the  _ Adora _ thing?" Scorpia's face was sympathetic. It made Catra more annoyed, she didn't need pity. She got enough of that already and she was sick of it.

"Yeah it's the  _ fucking _ Adora thing," Catra broke another pencil and groaned. All her songs for this class were coming out like some edge-lord writing about a breakup. 

"I can't believe she would take the auditorium from us! And I used to think she was so nice," Scorpia sighed, slumping into the empty chair next to Catra. 

"Yeah, first the football team takes the whole damn budget and now she's taking this too. She has some nerve for a Brightmoon trust fund baby," Catra ground out. It did please her  _ a little _ bit to see Adora playing dirty. She wasn't as high and mighty as she pretended to be. It almost gave her a glimpse of the Adora she knew, the one she grew up with. The one that had called their kindergarten teacher a dumb-face. The one who had punched Lonnie when she had made fun of Catra. The one that started lunchroom brawls with her.

"If only there was some way we could get back at them," Scorpia said innocently. But it gave Catra one hell of an idea. 

"Hey, Entrapta. Do you know anything about fire alarms?" 

  
  


 

After all the preparing she had done, all the hounding and practice the first home football game was here. There were only three of them, all a few weeks apart and that would be all the marching band would perform before switching to mostly concert band and preparing for some holiday related parades in November. That number was very small and Catra had always wished there had been more, not for the football team though. Football seemed to be the useless element in the equation; the band, cheerleaders, hell even the color guard were all performers. The only thing the football team did was throw or kick a ball around and hope their muscles were enough to carry them. 

Everyone was gearing up while Catra was running around making sure everyone had their shoes and uniforms, hounding freshmen over changing their reeds. Mermista was taking attendance to make sure no one was trying to skip. Entrapta was even helping to some extent, setting up the camera equipment so it could go on the school website. Scorpia was running around handing out pizza from last-minute rehearsal. When everything finally seemed to be under control Catra went into the band closet to put on her uniform and get her instrument together. She wanted to be alone while she prepared herself. It was her first time leading a show for a high school band. She didn't want to fuck it up somehow. She always found a way to wreck things but not this time. At least she hoped not. 

Her calm was interrupted as she threw the second overall strap over her shoulder. She had expected it to be Mermista telling her to go faster or maybe Scorpia coming to harass her. Instead, it was a blonde goddess in a white and gold football uniform. Adora stood clutching her helmet to her hip, serious expression on her face. She made it look like she was going to war rather than just risking a serious concussion. Catra could almost picture her now, running across a warzone in white and gold, sword in hand. Instead, she was cornering Catra in a closet, something Catra would normally hate. But she felt her body temperature spike as she saw every arm muscle, every pronounced leg muscle in those tight pants. Adora's proximity in this tight space wasn't helping.  _ Why did she have to be so hot?  _

" _ Hey, Catra _ ," Adora said it in a way that almost made her melt onto the floor. She was cocky; Adora could be from time to time. With Catra she had always acted like a spooked horse. It shouldn't be affecting Catra. 

"That's cute, did you practice that?" Catra chuckled as Adora turned red, "What do you need Princess? I need to get going soon." 

"I came here to apologize. About the auditorium. It was childish and stupid and I'm sorry. My history class is going to move to the library so you can have it back." Adora ran her hand through her hair like she always did when she was ashamed of herself. It took Catra aback. When Adora decided she was in the right there was usually nothing that could be said by anyone to convince her otherwise. 

"Well, thanks, Princess. Kyle's going to need that extra practice," Catra smirked. She knew she was deflecting from herself, but it was a relief to have that space back. 

"I wanted to wish you luck for tonight. You've been working hard for this, I can't wait to see the show." The way Adora was talking to her made her want to run the other direction and never look back. She was being  _ too _ nice. She had an ulterior motive, she just couldn't pinpoint what it was. Maybe she knew about Catra's revenge plan? It wouldn't be surprising, Entrapta and Scorpia were not good at keeping secrets. 

"Psh, you're the one who's going to need luck. Your team has  _ never _ won," Catra could feel her heart beat in her ears as Adora stepped closer and closer. Adora put her free hand against the wall behind Catra, leaning in closer. Every hair on Catra's body stood up.  _ Since when did she smell this good? _

"You could just try saying something nice you know," Adora snickered. She was leaning far too close. Catra thought about pushing her away. But the stronger thought that called every cell in her body was to pull her closer and finally try the one thing she had never thought Adora would be willing to give her. 

"Hey, Catra we're all set up for-" Scorpia opened the door to see the whole scene. Adora backed away politely, blushing from ear to ear. Catra grabbed her jacket from the hanger it was on, cursing Scorpia for interrupting. Of course, it was probably in her head that Adora was going to kiss her. Perfect Adora could have anyone she wanted, why the hell would she want her? She started angrily throwing her uniform on but Adora turned to her and started doing the buttons for her. 

"Can we talk after the game?" Adora whispered. 

"Sure. Under the bleachers." Catra raised her brow. 

"Perfect. I'll see you there," Adora smiled before leaving, scooting past Scorpia on her way. 

"So.... what was that about?" Scorpia asked. 

"Fucked if I know." 

 

 

Catra was supposed to be enjoying herself. She roar of the crowd that always got her excited, the salty food after the halftime show that was always the best, the adrenaline when she marched on the field. The half time show had even been more than halfway decent. But she just felt angry and anxious. She should be celebrating a victory and getting pumped to play "Smoke on the Water" at least six more times before the night was over. Yet here she was in line for some overpriced popcorn with the entire band seething, trying to figure out  _ what the hell _ Adora could want from her. Catra had said everything she needed to say to her. Adora was one for long drawn out talks, even if they weren't about her feelings in a meaningful way. It was how Adora figured things out, talking out loud  _ at _ Catra. Catra wasn't in the mood to deal with it anymore. 

"Why are your panties in a twist?" Mermista feigned interest as she ate her pretzel, waiting for Catra to order her food. 

"Don't know what you're talking about," Catra murmured.

"Is it because Adora cornered you in the closet?" Scorpia asked, a concerned look on her face as she licked her snow cone. 

"Wait Adora did  _ what _ ?" Mermista whipped her head around. Catra had almost forgotten Mermista was friends with Adora. 

"What you're telling me Adora doesn't corner  _ every _ girl in various closets around school?" Catra scoffed. She took her food and handed over the money before passing the change to Entrapta. 

"Yeah, they  _ wish _ . She doesn't show interest in  _ anyone _ . Pretty sure she got asked by a dozen people to go to homecoming and said no to all of them," Mermista droned, offering Catra half her pretzel. Catra took it, still starving from marching with heavy gear. She hadn't had much time to eat before the game started. 

"Wow, she must be really popular here!" Scorpia beamed. Scorpia was happy for everyone constantly. She tried to correct her expression as Catra glared at her. 

"She always was a people pleaser," Catra growled. She turned to go back to the band's seats with her group following behind. The crowd was getting riled up again, cheering so loud it hurt her head from the concession stand. She gazed at the scoreboard in curiosity and  _ of course _ , their team just had to be winning. Adora and Lonnie were never going to shut up about this. Lonnie was going to speak of nothing else for weeks like she had when she was in lacrosse. And everyone in the school was going to sing Adora's praises and completely forget how hard the rest of them worked. It was always like that, Adora just being  _ alive _ was enough to eclipse any accomplishment Catra ever had. All the long hours of leading and teaching would be wiped away once Adora took the spotlight again. At least her plan to get back at Adora would take some of the sting away. 

  
  


 

Catra was getting tired of waiting for Adora. Waiting for Adora to value her, waiting for Adora to show up a meeting that  _ she _ set up. It was already dark. She would be walking home alone in the dark pretty soon. She could have asked Scorpia to wait for her but she didn't want her getting any ideas. And she had no intention of asking Mermista since the girl didn't have a car. It would mean  _ another _ aggravating car ride with Sea Hawk fawning all over her friend, a prospect that made her want to vomit.

"Catra! Sorry to make you wait!" Adora came running under the bleachers, uniform still on. She was out of breath and red-faced.  _ Did she run here? Just to see her? _ Adora always was the desperate type.

"You know, the uniform actually gets  _ stupider _ the more I look at it," Catra sneered. She crossed her arms across her chest, guarding herself. She was sick of letting herself be at Adora's beck and call. Even after all this time, even after all she had done to her, Adora still held her heart. And it was almost like she knew that Catra couldn't say no to her, couldn't resist if Adora kept beckoning with her soft eyes. 

"Psh, like our old school's uniforms were any better. The band ones were even worse. Remember that horrible maroon?" Adora laughed. She held her right arm in her hand, rubbing up and down like she did when she was nervous. Catra wasn't sure why Adora was unnerved. She was the one who kept cornering her not the other way around.

"Fair enough but at least it didn't have all the  _ frilly _ shit this school does," Catra groaned. They stood in silence for what felt like forever. Catra wanted to run as far away as she could. None of this felt like what she was used to with Adora. The silences used to be so comfortable she would forget they were there. It was almost as though she had someone who could read her mind. Now it was as if she was standing face to face with a stranger.

"I wanted to tell you how great your routine was. It was impressive, really smooth. I can tell you put a  _ ton _ of work into it," Adora looked bashful. What had gotten into her? 

"You don't have to do that." 

"Do what?" 

"Pity me. I get it, you  _ won _ . You carried the team to victory, you're the star just like always. I don't need this shit, Adora. Just talk to me like a  _ normal person _ !" Catra yelled. She was exhausted. Dancing around her feelings wasn't her style.

"I don't  _ pity _ you Catra! I  _ admire _ you. Why is it so impossible for you to believe?" Adora was exasperated, stepping towards Catra. She got so close it was almost like earlier in the band closet. Catra could feel a lump in her throat rising. "You're right about me. All I can do is throw a ball. And that's the  _ only _ time people like me. They don't like  _ me _ , they like what I can do for them. They don't understand me. Not like you. You've been able to see through me this whole time." Adora was leaning in too close. Catra would have made a joke about her b.o. but she was too stunned to move. Adora wasn't really going to kiss her. She had never shown any interest in her before, why would she start now? 

"What did you  _ miss me _ or something?" Catra said weakly. Every cell in her body was telling her to kiss her. She had nothing left to lose. She didn't have Adora's friendship anymore. She could do it and if she rejected her she wouldn't lose a thing. Just a couple of night's sleep. She would be able to remember the kiss forever though. 

" _ Of course _ I missed you. I've missed you every day since I left," Adora's eyes looked teary.  _ Then why didn't you call me? Why didn't you visit?  _ The questions were burning in the back of her brain but all she could think about were Adora's lips and the light smell of coconut in the air between them. She jolted as her phone started ringing and she struggled to get it out of her pocket. 

"Shit," she wanted to throw her phone away as she saw it was her demon guardian calling. She hastily answered the call. "Hello?" 

"Catra, I'm here to retrieve you. It's almost ten, I don't want you stopped by police while walking home. Get to the front of the school  _ immediately _ ." 

"Of course, I'll be right there," Catra tried not to let her whole body shake. 

"Have you seen Adora? I was hoping she was still here. I wanted to see how she's doing in her new home." Of course, this was about Adora. She was here to keep her creepy obsession going, she didn't give a damn if Catra had to walk home in the dark. She could be abducted for all she cared as long as she got to see her golden child. 

"No, I haven't. I've been staying away from her just like you told me." Her eyes met Adora’s and it occurred to her how close she was. It made her whole body tremble.

" _ Surprising _ you can follow orders for once. No matter, I will send a message with Lonnie. Don't make me _ wait _ for you." Shadow Weaver abruptly hung up on her which was nothing new. She pushed past Adora, not looking back. 

"I have to go. Goodbye Adora." 

"Can we talk later? I _ really _ wanted to talk." 

"Yeah, maybe I'll see you at the dance. Scorpia's making me go. Oh and sorry in advance."  

"For  _ what _ ?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We'll be seeing a lot of Adora's thought process behind this chapter in the next chapter! Don't worry y'all, Adora wants to kiss Catra sooooo bad. Sorry I was gone for a while! Between work, school, and PTSD symptoms I've been having a wild ride. Please leave a comment it would mean the world to me!


	7. Dancing With A Stranger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra's up to no good at the homecoming dance and Adora is going to find out what even if it ruins her night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, fellow gays, do I have some content for you!

Adora had tried everything: taking a cold shower, running for miles, looking at other girls. None of it was working. Catra was all she could think about. She had almost kissed her, she had almost kissed her _best friend_ twice in one day because her therapist had asked her if she was interested in Catra romantically when she told her about stealing the auditorium. It had hit her like a ton of bricks. She had a crush on _Catra_ . At first, she didn't want to believe it. It was Catra, her best friend for as long as she could remember. Why hadn't she noticed? When she thought about it, _really_ let herself think about it, she realized she'd felt that way for a long time.

Catra had looked like she wanted her to kiss her. She wouldn't have tried if she hadn't looked at her so longingly. She certainly wouldn't have tried _twice_ . Scorpia and Shadow Weaver had ruined everything, though the latter doing so wasn't a surprise. _Ugh, Scorpia._ Adora still couldn't believe Catra was going with _her_ to the homecoming dance. She couldn't ignore that it made her jealous. She had _begged_ Catra to go to their sophomore homecoming dance with her and it had been like pulling teeth. How did Scorpia convince her to go?

That wasn't the only problem Adora had to contemplate as she went for her run. Conflict was everywhere in her life it seemed. This dance wasn't going to be even _slightly_ fun for her now. Bow had told Glimmer he was going with Perfuma and she was _furious_ . They were still fighting and it wasn't going to stop anytime soon. It was going to be awkward when everyone came over their house later to get ready for the dance. Glimmer would probably give everyone the silent treatment, all while trying to make Bow jealous. Perfuma would try to be civil. Mermista would probably be cursing her luck that she didn't decide to get ready at home. And the whole time Adora would be wondering what Catra was going to wear to the dance and if going with Scorpia was a _date_. She wouldn't even be able to talk about it even if she had wanted to.

When she rounded the corner Bow's car was in the driveway. She stopped a few houses down, deciding she would walk the rest of the way. The last thing she wanted was to start this mess earlier than necessary. She cursed Glimmer for insisting everyone came over several hours early to get ready. That had been before she knew Bow was going with Perfuma but still. Why couldn't they just throw their dresses on and go? If it was up to her she would have just worn her letterman, maybe her chucks. Girls went crazy for her in that jacket, so why change a good thing?  But Glimmer had insisted she dress up and had taken her shopping with Bow, which had been horrible and awkward, ending with Glimmer crying after Bow left.

In her driveway was Mermista standing outside leaning against Bow's car. She was on her phone as always, dry cleaning bag in hand. Her hair looked like she had gone to a salon. Should Adora have done that? She was regretting not doing it because it could have gotten her out of this horrible afternoon. She would pay _anyone_ to get her out of this. She didn't want to take sides but she was kind of on Bow's side. He couldn't just sideline his whole life because Glimmer felt lonely. They were seniors in high school, he should try spreading his wings. Glimmer could have gone with someone else but instead, she would be glued to Adora the whole night sulking.

"You avoiding the inevitable is not going to make it better Adora," Mermista looked up from her phone, same aggravated expression on her face.

"You say as you haven't gone inside yet either," Adora laughed.

"I'm just not going in there by myself. I don't want to die when I walk in. Bow and Perfuma are in the line of fire already and I _don't_ want to get involved."

"Do you think we could just leave? Like walk away and never look back?"

"I wish. I already told a bunch of people I was going. And you literally live there."

"I mean I've only lived there for a year. Maybe no one would miss me," Adora joked.

"Come on, let's go. Your dress is in there and I have to make sure all of you didn't pick something that will _embarrass_ me," Mermista started marching herself to the front door, Adora lagging behind. Mermista waited for Adora to open the door and they went in. Perfuma and Bow were sitting on the couch. Glimmer was nowhere in sight which made Adora relieved. It also made her feel guilty that she was relieved.

"Mermista you're finally here!" Perfuma stood and embraced her, "Your hair looks _amazing_! Is Sea Hawk coming over too?"

"Ew, no. He's meeting us there. I can't put on makeup while he's shouting sea shanties."

"Where's Glimmer?" Adora asked. She couldn't pretend her sister was off being happy somewhere when she was probably crying. Adora shouldn't have gone for a run but she couldn't be here when everyone got here. The tension would give her a panic attack and she would have had to take a run anyway. She felt like a bad sister for not being there.

"She's upstairs. She said she was getting both of your dresses. And hiding your letterman so you couldn't put it over your dress," Bow smiled.

"What?! Come on, girls _love_ that jacket. Plus what if it's cold in there or something?" Adora felt defensive. Glimmer hated her fashion sense but she shouldn't hide her stuff.

"You _really_ want Catra making fun of you for wearing that all night?" Mermista raised her eyebrow.

"Wait Catra's going? Catra doesn't seem like the type of person who likes dances," Bow commented.

" _She isn't_. She's just going because _Scorpia_ asked her to," Adora swallowed. It shouldn't make her feel this way. Catra could do whatever she wanted.

"Yeah she is not going because of Scorpia, I can tell you that," Mermista said, inspecting her nails.

"Wait, she's not?" Why did that make Adora feel good? She should feel bad about that.

"She barely tolerates Scorpia. She said she's going to-" Mermista cut off, "Uh, nevermind. Not supposed to tell you that." That made Adora suspicious. Why else would Catra go to a dance? Catra _hated_ dances, the people who went to them, most of the music played at them. Catra was planning something, something _bad_. She had to figure out what it was before she ruined homecoming. She was probably planning to soak the homecoming queen in pigs blood because she thought Adora would win.

"Oh, Adora you're back. I was getting worried, we have to start getting ready. And Mermista's here!" Glimmer was coming down the stairs with two dry cleaning bags and an arm full of makeup. Adora took some of it when Glimmer got to the bottom of the stairs and put it on the coffee table next to a makeup bag that was obviously Perfuma's. Glimmer didn't look too jealous yet, but Adora knew it was only a matter of time. Mermista and Perfuma started working on their own makeup, holding mirrors up and sitting next to each other as they started commenting on what the other was going to use. There was a thing called clean beauty that Perfuma was into but she was always interested in some new and odd product. Adora didn't know any items the two were talking about but focusing on them was better than focusing on the tension in the air.

"So Adora, what do you want to do for makeup?" Glimmer smiled up at her as she sat down on the floor, taking out lots of sparkly and unicorn-inspired items from her makeup bag.

"Uh... Nothing?" Adora shrugged. She had never put on makeup before and she wasn't about to start now. She had only ever put makeup on Catra, helping her with winged eyeliner when they were in middle school. Catra had gotten the hang of it after a while and did it herself so Adora stopped.

" _Seriously_? What about your hair?" Glimmer sighed.

"Nothing? I mean, I thought it looked _nice_ the way it is?" Adora squeaked, running her hand through her ponytail. There wasn't much of anything she could do with it anyways since she got an undercut.

"Ugh, Adora this is our first homecoming together! You wouldn’t go last year! I'm at least brushing it and putting some moisturizer on you." Glimmer started digging through one of her bags.

"You should make sure she has SPF on too!" Perfuma suggested.

"Why? She's going to be _inside_ at _night_ ," Mermista pointed out.

"That's true I forgot. Still, better safe than sorry." Glimmer rolled her eyes as she started pulling Adora's ponytail down. Everyone was being civil but Adora's nerves were running wild. Why did Catra want to go to a dance? Was she planning something? What would she even wear? Why did Adora have to have a stupid crush on her? Why couldn't just try to enjoy the night with her new friends and family?

  


 

 

"I can't believe he would just ditch me!" Glimmer whined. She and Adora were standing in the corner next to Mermista and Sea Hawk who were only hanging out with them because they were "waiting for a song that sucked less".  Sea Hawk was fawning all over Mermista who was visibly mortified.

"Glimmer, it's ok. He just wants to get to know Perfuma better, there's no harm in that right?" Adora was trying her best to be understanding. If Bow and Perfuma were interested in each other romantically it wouldn't ruin what he had with Glimmer. Adora had to remind herself to be logical about this. Feelings often times clouded judgment and there was an obvious solution somewhere in this gunk called emotions.

"I've never had that many friends Adora. It's always just been me and Bow. What if he likes his new friends more than me?"

"That's not going to happen Glimmer. Bow isn't the type to leave all his old friends behind and neither am-" Adora's heart stopped as she saw Catra walk in, dark purple pants and an untucked red dress shirt, tie hanging completely undone. She was on Scorpia's arm and Scorpia looked nice in a sleek black dress. "I..." Adora didn't want to admit to herself that she had been anxiously waiting for Catra to show up. She didn't want to admit how _good_ Catra looked. And she really didn't want to admit how upset she was about her hanging off Scorpia.

"Um, earth to Adora?" Glimmer tugged at Adora's arm.

"What? Oh, sorry Glimmer. I'm just trying to figure out why Catra's here. She's up to no good, I can feel it." Adora clenched her fist in her dress.

"Uh, I was asking if you wanted to go say hi? I wanted to say hi to Scorpia anyways."

"Why do you want to say hi to _Scorpia_?" Adora's head whipped around.

"She's in my cooking club remember?" Great, now Glimmer looked angry with her. Adora did listen, she just forgot Scorpia was in that club too. Why had she thought it was Entrapta for some reason? Maybe because Entrapta loved tiny food? Either way, at least now she had an excuse to go see what Catra was up to.

"Sorry, I thought it was Entrapta in your club for some reason, maybe because they hang out so much. We can go say hi, that's a great idea," Adora straightened her dress and looked at her sister, "How does my hair look?"

"It looks fine, nothing Catra hasn't _seen_ before. Come on let's go before we lose them in the crowd," Glimmer sighed looking longingly over at Bow and Perfuma. She grabbed Adora's hand and they made their way through their peers who were grinding on each other. Scorpia and Catra were standing at the food table, Scorpia shoveling food into her face. Adora wouldn't be surprised if Shadow Weaver wasn't feeding them enough the way Scorpia was eating.

" _Hey, Adora_ ," Catra purred. Her eyeliner could have cut Adora it was so sharp.

"Catra I _know_ you're up to something."

"Adora, I am  _shocked_ by this accusation! I'm just trying to have a good time with my friend _Scorpia_ here. She _insisted_ I come with her, _isn't that sweet_?" Sarcasm was dripping from her voice, a playful smirk across her face. Okay, Catra was definitely up to something.

"Catra I'm not _stupid_. I _know_ when you're up to something. If I have to follow you around all night to figure out what it is I will." Catra smirked at this, leaning her body weight on the hand that was on the table towards Adora.

"I don't know what you're talking about _Princess_. But have fun following me. Scorpia, I'm going to make my rounds say hi to the band kids. Have fun with Twinkle," she cackled as she started strutting off.

"Glimmer!" Scorpia and Glimmer said in unison before Catra walked away, looking at each other and smiling. Scorpia handed Glimmer some food and started talking with her, but Adora missed it as she stalked after Catra. She kept falling behind Catra, catching glimpses of her in the crowd. She would see her stop and start talking to another band member but just as she almost got there one of her own friends would demand her attention. Before she knew it she had lost Catra again, this time probably for good. Catra had probably done whatever it was she was going to do, Adora should try to enjoy herself. But as she listened to them announce the winners of homecoming king and queen she couldn't help but feel like Catra _wanted_ her to follow her. She clapped for Bow and Perfuma and breathed a sigh of relief that Catra hadn't pulled a Carrie as they got crowned. She was also beyond relieved she didn't win. She wouldn't have looked right up there, especially not with Bow.

Before Adora knew what was happening the principal was announcing the start of the dance that came after crowning them and everyone was scrambling to pair up with their dates or their friends. She started looking for Glimmer knowing she was brooding in a corner somewhere watching Bow and Perfuma dance. Or she was in the bathroom crying. Neither option was acceptable in Adora's opinion. As she turned to look for her sister there was Catra, hand outstretched. The suggestion was obvious as the song started, but the way Catra's eyebrow was arched made her feel like it was a challenge. But this was all she wanted, her heart beating out of her chest as she took Catra's hand. Catra pulled her in closer and took her waist as they started the awkward high school slow dance. Adora placed her hands on Catra's shoulders, panicking at how close she was.

"I don't know about you but I'm having a _blast_ ," Catra gave a conceited smile that made Adora's heart twist in knots.

"Whatever you're planning it _won't work_."

"Oh, Adora. It already has," she dipped her. Adora looked up at her lips and then back at her eyes. If Catra had done this at their sophomore dance would Adora have kissed her? Would she have the nerve if she knew how she had felt then?

"What did you do?" Adora wished Catra didn't have to spend all her time getting in trouble.

" _I_ didn't do anything. _Scorpia_ , on the other hand, was quite busy spiking the punch," Catra laughed, pulling Adora back up, keeping her close.

"Seriously Catra? I thought you were going to do something terrible," Adora sighed in relief. Not that spiking the punch was great but it was better than what Adora’s imagination had been telling her.

"Why do you act like I'm some kind of super villain? I mean it's  _flattering_ but ridiculous," Catra chuckled.

"I don't know. I should have expected something mild. After you said "sorry in advance" last time I saw you, all you did was set off the sprinklers and fire alarm in the girls' locker room. Only Lonnie and I got wet," Adora laughed. Catra twirled her and brought her back quickly, a small smile on her face.

"Uh, _yeah_ I did that on _purpose_ . I didn't want to punish the whole team for _you_ being a dick. Though getting Lonnie was an added bonus." Adora noticed the slow song had stopped playing and they were playing another one, probably because Perfuma and Bow looked so happy to have won. Adora started to pull away, knowing Catra probably didn't want to dance with her again. She had just been gloating about spiking the punch after all. "What do you say? One more, for old times sake?" Adora took her hand hesitantly and Catra pulled her back in. Adora was surprised that Catra still wanted to dance, let alone to a Taylor Swift song. Catra notoriously hated her to the point of trying to destroy Shadow Weaver's car radio.

"This is nice. We should do this more often," Adora commented. She wanted to test the waters, see if Catra was interested in being friends again.

"I'm _not_ taking any dance classes just so you can dance with me," Catra laughed. Her laugh was genuine, infectious. How Adora had missed her, so close she could count all her freckles, so near she could run her hands through her hair like she used to. Catra would pull away if she did that. That was the last thing Adora wanted.

"Do you still hate me?" Adora couldn't help but let it slip out as Catra dipped her.

"Yes, I hate your guts," Catra laughed. Adora kept looking at her lips, kept _wishing_ she had the courage. If Catra really hated her, what did she have to lose? She already lost her best friend. She saw her every school day but she didn't get to make her laugh. She didn't get to confide in her, sleep next to her in the best neverending sleepover they used to have. She didn't paint Catra's nails black, didn't watch horror movies with her, didn't fall asleep on her shoulder. She already didn't have all those things anymore.

"I'm sorry," Adora said gently, thinking to herself how beautiful Catra's eyes were. Catra's expression was somewhere between confusion and annoyance as Adora pulled her down by her collar and did the one thing she had been wanting to do all night. She closed her eyes because she couldn't bear to see Catra's disgust when she realized what was going on, couldn't bear the rejection. Catra's lips were so soft and she was so warm and Adora was shaking but she held onto Catra's shirt for dear life. Catra wasn't pulling away and Adora didn't know if that was a good sign or not. She slowly pulled away and opened her eyes.

"A-Adora?" Catra looked frightened, like when Shadow Weaver was going to punish her when they were little. Catra dropped Adora and she fell on her ass. Catra started backing away slowly, eyes wide before turning and running full speed the other direction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess I'm the only one in the fandom who ships Scorpia and Glimmer but I don't give a fuck I'mma ship it, you can't stop me fools. I'm so excited about this chapter, get it Adora!!!! I listened to a lot of I wanna be your girlfriend by girl in red while I wrote this, especially the end. I love all your comments, they are giving me the strength to keep going and they make my day! Thanks so much for reading!


	8. Hold Me Like You'll Never Leave Me

_Adora's just fucking with you._ That's what she told herself over and over, her new mantra running through her head. She kept telling herself all night as she couldn't sleep. She kept repeating it the next day as she waited for Mermista's birthday party. She debated not going, pretending she was sick or dead. She could get herself grounded easily, it was like breathing to her. She _damned_ herself for promising Mermista and she  _damned_ herself for becoming friends with one of Adora's friends. Part of her knew she needed this, needed to go to a high school party and get wasted so she didn't have to think about Adora. Even if Adora was there Catra probably wouldn't notice as she'd be too smashed to give a fuck.

On top of her being on edge, she had to spend the whole day listening to Scorpia _gush_ about Adora's sister. Scorpia told her and Entrapta _everything_ Sparkles said or did at the dance, how they had a lovely little friend dance together. Scorpia had a habit of repeating herself over and over, regardless of how many times she had said it. Entrapta seemed to be the only person who didn't mind, probably because she was lost in her own little world constantly. She did pay attention, she could repeat any part of someone's story on request but it didn't seem like she was actively listening or processing what was being said to her. Entrapta was a parrot and Scorpia was an overly excited kindergartener but they were still the best options Catra had in her home. But if she had to listen to Scorpia say how excited she was to see Glimmer that night _one more time_ she was going to claw her own ears off.

Mermista's parents weren't going to be home all weekend. Catra couldn't fathom just _leaving_ your child home alone and trusting them with your big ass house. Mermista was somewhat responsible but even she wasn't above throwing a rager the moment her parents were gone. It was one of the things Catra admired about her. Adora was probably the only person she knew who wouldn't do that other than that kid Bow she hung out with. He seemed like a downer too. She doubted either of their parents would ever leave them alone though. Catra kept kicking herself mentally for thinking about Adora, thinking about how Adora _kissed_ , her taking all the breath out of her lungs and stealing her heart out of her chest. If she kept scolding herself _maybe_ she could forget her.

Catra got there early with her fellow foster children, gift in one hand and flask in the other. She wasn't taking any chances, she had stolen some from Hordak's office and she didn't care if she got caught. She was getting drunk if it was the last thing she did tonight. She had gotten Mermista a gift card to the hair salon she had mentioned being in love with and hoped that was an acceptable offering. Knowing Mermista she probably wouldn't care or if she did it would be impossible to tell. Catra didn't like to admit that she genuinely did want her friend to be happy. It was weird to think she had any friends at all because she could remember when she only had one.

"Catra and friends, I welcome you to my lovely Mermista's abode!" Sea Hawk was at the entrance politely taking gifts. Catra raised her brow at Mermista as she found her in the living room.

"I had to give him _something_ to do or he would try to set something on fire. Or he would start drinking too early and if anyone is getting drunk tonight it's me and you after all the ass we've busted for that fucking football game," Mermista explained.

"Fuck yeah, you're saying exactly what I need to hear," Catra plopped down next to her. Mermista looked around for a minute before staring at Catra.

"So, _what the fuck_ happened with you and Adora last night?"

"Don't know what you're talking about," Catra gave a disinterested tone.

"Dude I saw her kiss you," Mermista whispered. _Well, fuck._

"She's a bitch, all the more reason to get drunk. Preferably before she gets here because I don't want to see her."

"Totally get it. There's tons of booze in the kitchen. Just pace yourself I am not cleaning up your vomit. Or anyone's for that matter."

"Perfect because I'm pretty sure whatever I brought is disgusting. I can literally smell it through my jacket and I was _not_ looking forward to it."

  


Mermista had decided to do a shot every time she opened a gift. She thankfully didn't have a table full so she wasn't going to get smashed right away. It was kind of a shame because Catra would love to see Mermista wasted and actually remember it. Instead, she had to stand as far away from Adora and her posse as possible while Mermista opened her gifts and Scorpia loudly oohed and ahhed. Adora looked uncomfortable and it made Catra feel slightly better. This kind of thing wasn't Adora's cup of tea. Underage drinking would probably give her a heart attack just watching it. She always had been a goodie two shoes, especially when she thought there was even a slight chance of getting in trouble. Thankfully not all her friends thought the same way.

Catra decided to join Mermista and Sea Hawk at the kitchen island so she could pick something better to drink. While Hordak's sludge was probably 100 proof she didn't really want to instantly throw up. She had only drunk occasionally so she knew it wouldn't take much to get her smashed. Mermista was pouring some shots for other band members and some of the football players who had shown up. Adora had decided she had to be right there, right in Catra's eyesight on the other side of the island so Catra took one shot and downed it. It thankfully had been lemon flavored so it wasn't terrible, though it did burn going down.

"Catra-"

"What Adora?" Catra snapped. Catra was not in the mood to talk to her. She wanted to push her as far away as possible. She could go upstairs and lock herself in Mermista's room but she was pretty sure depression drinking was frowned upon, even if that's what half of these kids were doing without admitting it to anyone.

"You shouldn't-"

" _Seriously Adora_ ? Look around you. Why don't you go lecture the kids on your team, wouldn't want them losing college scholarships _right_? I'm just trying to have fun here."

"You don't have to drink to have fun Catra." She hated that disappointed tone. Why did Adora get to judge her? Just because she had been on the right side of the tracks a little longer didn't mean she got to come off high and mighty. She came from the gutter just like the rest of the foster kids did.

"Like you would know. You've never let loose and had fun in your life. You wouldn't know fun if it hit you in the face," Catra snarled.

"I'm fun!" Adora said a little too defensively.

"Okay, Princess, whatever helps you sleep at night," Catra cackled. Adora got that look in her eyes, the one she got when she was determined to prove Catra wrong. There was no way Adora was going to prove her wrong; she was standing there like a soccer mom who found out her teenager was drinking. But Adora was always surprising her. She was never more surprised than when Adora grabbed five shots and downed them in a row.

"Yeah, girl get it!" Mermista yelled, already somewhat drunk, hanging off Sea Hawk. Catra couldn't help but laugh along with her. Adora had balls, she would give her that.

"I am ten times more fun than you Catra. You'll see!" Adora smiled, grabbing a couple of jello shots. Now this, _this_ Catra had to see. She had never seen Adora try so hard in her life. Even in middle school, Adora had never been _this_ desperate. It was kind of cute that she was so desperate for Catra's attention. Maybe Adora would get a taste of her own medicine for once. Catra followed her out into the living room, ready for the show of a lifetime.

  


 

Adora being drunk had been funny at first. Adora was in the middle of the fray, dancing on counters, loudly yelling the lyrics to Taylor Swift. That part was hilarious. But there were two parts of her being wasted that weren't funny, the first being that she was being too flirty with Catra. She kept hanging all over her, oblivious to how angry Catra still was with her. She was also unknowingly pressing herself all over Catra in ways that were driving Catra crazy, that made her want to push her away but also pull her in closer. Adora was giggly and happy and actually seemed interested in Catra. It was almost Catra's dream except for the fact Adora was drunk and wouldn't feel this way in the morning no matter how good her memory was.

The second problem that was making her blood boil were several guys from the football team. The way they were looking at Adora made her want to start a fight and she had only had one shot hours ago. This put Catra's whole body on edge and she hadn't been able to enjoy herself much. Adora's sister and her friend Bow were nowhere to be found and there was no way she was leaving Adora with the flower hippy or Mermista who was probably somewhere puking. So that left the one option when Adora started whining that she was tired, carrying a very heavy Adora up the stairs and locking them in the guest room.

Adora giggled as she slumped onto the bed. Catra turned her on her side so she wouldn't choke on her own vomit in the middle of the night. No wonder Adora didn't like going to parties when you were the only responsible one you had to make sure no one died. Catra took off her sweatshirt and sat at the bottom of the bed cursing having to sleep on the floor. This was not the night Catra had in mind. She should have been drunk with Mermista. Even listening to Entrapta talk about social experiments was better than being trapped in a room with Adora until morning. At least she was drunk out of her mind. Now she wouldn't apologize to Catra for kissing her. She would probably say some shit about how she was curious and how Catra was the only lesbian she knew. How she thought Catra wouldn't mind.

"Catra, where are you?" Adora whined, drawing out her syllables.

"I'm right here you idiot." Catra rolled her eyes. She threw off her shoes before taking Adora's off and throwing them next to hers.

"Can you come here?" Adora whimpered. Catra sighed and laid down on the bed facing Adora so she wouldn't get any more requests from her. Adora closed the distance immediately and held onto her like she used to. Like she did when she got scolded by Shadow Weaver, rare though it was.

"T-told you, I'm fun," Adora hiccuped into Catra's shoulder.

"Yep, this is _so_ much fun," Catra groaned. Catra stiffened as Adora started running her hands through her hair. She should push her away but she was pretty sure Adora would cry if she did that. She wouldn't remember this in the morning anyway so it wasn't going to hurt Catra in the long run. Adora wouldn't hold this against her, try to be friends with her again just because Catra let her touch her hair. Adora muttered something into her shoulder.

"I can't hear you, Adora." Adora pulled away and looked up at Catra, expression very serious. It reminded Catra of when they were kids and Adora had some kind of grand idea she would tell her about.

"I said you're so beautiful," Adora smiled a small, shy smile. Catra felt her heart stop and accelerate at the same time. Her whole body told her to hold Adora and never let go. She was still angry. She wanted to push Adora off the bed. She wanted to yell in her face. She knew she couldn't do either.

"So are you," Catra muttered. Adora had always been pretty. Catra was sure she knew it too, with Shadow Weaver and others always telling her.

"But I wasn't talking about me I was talking about you," Adora informed her, tracing the freckles on her face with a wonder Catra had only seen in a baby Adora, "I never got to tell you and then I moved away."

"Tell me what?" Catra gulped.

"That you're beautiful! And that I missed you every day. And that I want to kiss you."

"You don't want to kiss me, Adora," Catra insisted.

"I do! I mean not right now because I feel funny. But later! Later I want to kiss you. I want to kiss you all the time. Your lips are soft and you're beautiful. You're my best friend and I don't want to kiss anyone else-" Drunk Adora was rambling, losing her train of thought as she looked sleepy.

"Tell you what, maybe when you're not wasted if you still feel that way we could try it again when you don't surprise the shit out of me."

"Psh, you surprised me, you dropped me! What kind of person drops someone when they give them a kiss?" Adora pouted running her hands through Catra's hair again, pulling herself closer.

"Who kisses people randomly in the middle of the dance when the other person hates their guts?"

"You don't hate me," Adora giggled into her neck.

"No, I don't," Catra admitted. She was still furious but that part of her was being quieted by the part that needed this. The part of her that hadn't had Adora close to her in over a year. The part of her that missed her best friend. The part of her that would always be in love with this girl. She felt weak for needing Adora, weak for wishing for months after she left that she would come back.

"If I kiss you when I'm sober will you promise not to drop me?"

"I promise."

"And you won't run away this time?" Adora sounded sad. Catra had replayed it in her head over and over, wondering if she should have stayed. She wanted to go back and see if Adora was playing with her. She didn't think she was. Drunk people usually didn't lie quite this much. Adora wanting to just kiss her wasn't what she wanted. She hated herself for it but she wanted all of her. She had never let herself dream of being with Adora because when they lived together it wasn't possible. She wasn't about to let herself start now.

"If you're sober and you kiss me I won't run away," she repeated, trying to hold back tears.

"I won't leave ever again," Adora whispered. She was twisting her fingers in Catra's hair, holding on for dear life.

"Don't say that you can't promise," Catra choked. Why did Adora have to say that of all things? Even when drunk she knew how to play Catra's emotions. Catra couldn't hold the tears and they ran down her face. She put her hand in Adora's hair, pulling it out of its ponytail.

"I shouldn't have left," Adora sighed. She sounded tired and defeated. It's what Catra wanted to hear from her. She wanted Adora to regret leaving her with every fiber of her being, she wanted the feelings to ruin her entire life. But it didn't sit well with her even though it was what she wanted. She had dreamed of Adora begging for her forgiveness, saying all the nice words she wanted, moving back in with them.

"I know why you left. I don't blame you," Catra admitted as Adora pulled back slightly to look at her, "But I can't forgive you. Not yet." There were too many painful memories, too many things left unsaid between them.

"Well, hurry up. I miss you," Adora murmured, nuzzling herself back into her spot at Catra's chest. She was on top of Catra's arm now but Catra was too tired to move it. She rested her head on top of Adora's. She would allow herself this one thing, this one small pleasure. She would let herself enjoy Adora's company for this one night. In the morning Adora would go home and Catra could pretend this night never happened. For now, she could listen to Adora's breathing and accept all the loving and drunk words that left her lips every so often. Just this once she would be kind to herself. She would let herself hope for just one night and in the morning she would go back to being the cynic she was born to be.

That was the last thing she thought of as she drifted off into sleep, Adora's hair gently touching her face. Adora was rubbing her back as she used to when they were young. She intertwined her legs with Catra's, holding on as though she would disappear. Adora wasn't wrong because as soon as the light hit Catra would sneak out of the room. She decided it as she snuggled closer to Adora, thinking how pleasant it was. Her hair was soft, her skin smelled nice, her words were music to her ears even if it was just telling her she was pretty. For now, it was enough to sustain her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who updated twice in one night because she couldn't sleep? This kid. Have some fluffy drunk Adora who is absolutely smitten with Catra. You're welcome y'all.


	9. Wish I Could Get A Little Undrunk

"Did you get to drink _anything_?" Mermista groaned, downing a glass of orange juice. Mermista had somehow made a decent spread of breakfast even hungover. Everyone had cleared out in the morning except for Catra who was trapped under Adora. Mermista had helped pry Adora off after she took several pictures of the scene. It had resulted in a still slightly drunk Adora whining about it before falling back asleep. Catra thought they were going to have to amputate her arm, she couldn't feel it for a good 45 minutes.

"I had that _one shot_ at the beginning of the night and then I had to play babysitter the rest of it so no. Also, I'm going to send you some photos of some football players and you're going to give me their names," Catra sent a few photos she had found on the school's website and screenshotted them, sending them to Mermista. Mermista groaned as her phone dinged but she looked at the photos despite the obvious pain the screen was causing her.

"Oh, them? I hate them. I didn't even invite them, I think some of the football team that I did invite brought them. I'll text you their names. I also know how to blackmail them so I'll send you that shit too," Mermista poured another glass of orange juice.

"Well, they were fucking gross, creeping on Adora while she was wasted. I don't want any girls getting hurt at parties. And I am _not_ going to start babysitting every drunk girl at every high school party, that seems like a good job for Adora." Catra started eating eggs like she was going to die. She didn't get any of the pizza last night because she had taken Adora upstairs early before a ton more people had gotten there. Last night hadn't been what she planned at all but it was somehow better. She got to say things to Adora she wouldn't have been able to say if Adora had been sober.

"Noted, I'll send a text around to warn people. Blackmail is always the answer with those kinds of guys though and I have _so much blackmail_ ," Mermista said around a bagel, "But since you didn't get to drink anything you're staying the night and we're getting smashed."

"That sounds amazing, I'm so glad we have a three day weekend. All I wanted was to get wasted and instead I was trapped under a huge football player for the entire night."

"I know you're trying to sound upset about it but your words and tone are contradicting each other," Mermista laughed.

"Hey, you don't get to make fun of me for that. You're a huge tsundere, you're the poster child for that," Catra crossed her arms defensively.

"Yeah but Sea Hawk _knows_ how I feel about him so it doesn't matter what I say to him, it just rolls right off. Adora is stupid, every time you say something mean to her she cries about it."

"She does not!" Catra cried. She knew Adora probably thought about her constantly. That was more by design than by any of Adora's doing. She didn't really believe that Adora had missed her or had thought about her outside of her savior complex. Why would she when she had all these new friends who were better than Catra?

"Uh, _yeah she does_. Not just in front of me either, you can ask anyone in our friend group. Pretty sure all of us have a story like that even Entrapta. She tries to make it out like it's not a big deal and she hates people seeing her like that but it happens a lot since you guys moved here."

"Psh, she could be crying over Lonnie or a cute puppy she saw on the internet," Catra grumbled. Did she really make Adora cry? Adora barely ever cried when they were growing up, even when she got in trouble with Shadow Weaver. Catra couldn't imagine Adora pushing away tears just because she was snarky with her. If anyone was used to Catra it was Adora. Right? It was to push back the guilt she felt building in her throat.

"What kind of puppy?" Adora yawned. Catra nearly choked on the egg she was eating. She hadn't noticed Adora sneaking up behind her.

"There was a funny story on Facebook about a big dog being chased by a chicken," Mermista supplied. Sometimes Catra couldn't tell who Mermista liked more of the two of them but she was glad she had her back when it was really important.

"Ugh, how are you guys eating? I'm so nauseous," Adora complained, sitting down on the stool next to Catra, holding her head in her hands.

"I'm not a lightweight," Mermista said.

"I didn't get to drink anything so there's nothing to be nauseous from," Catra stated.

"You drank, I saw you drink," Adora said suspiciously.

"Yeah, _one shot_ at the beginning of the night! That's not enough to get drunk. I had to play _babysitter_ so I didn't drink anything else," Catra scoffed.

"You didn't have to," Adora's face was turning red. Shit, I hope she doesn't remember anything.

"Yeah, I did. Your sister and her friend were nowhere in sight and I wasn't going to leave you with a drunk Mermista or that weird flower girl."

"Perfuma would have done fine," Adora replied defensively.

"She hangs out with _Entrapta_. I was not going to risk it," Catra laughed.

"Aw, you do care!" Adora pushed her arm playfully which made Catra bristle.

"Yeah right! I don't care about you," Catra grumbled.

"Admit it, you like me!" Adora was beaming. It was almost cute.

"Get over yourself," Catra looked away from Adora. This was not a conversation she wanted to have especially not in front of Mermista.

"Not until you admit you like me!" Adora reached over to give her a noogie which Catra half-heartedly tried to get out of, pushing Adora.

"Ugh, get a room," Mermista groaned. Catra immediately pulled away. This was why she kept disappointing herself, she kept letting Adora get close so she could hurt her. She shouldn't have let Adora try banter, she should have kicked her. She stole a glance at Adora. She didn't look mortified but that didn't mean anything. Adora was usually too dense to get that kind of hint.

"Was I, uh, really embarrassing?" Adora asked sheepishly, "I've never had that much to drink before."

"I mean you were _hilarious_ but you didn't puke or anything. Which is pretty impressive considering you're a lightweight," Catra laughed.

"I thought I was going to for like eighty percent of the night," Adora chuckled.

"Glad you didn't puke on me then since you were hanging all over me during the party," Catra cackled. Catra was hoping that would embarrass Adora, though it probably wouldn't. Adora didn't like PDA with anyone _except_ Catra. Even when high school started Adora had refused to give up her big theatrical displays of affection in the hallways.

"I'm glad I didn't either your jacket was nice," Adora smiled. Catra could feel her flight response tell her to run before her heart stopped altogether. Adora had always complimented her when they were kids and it had made her uncomfortable even then. Catra wondered just how long she was in love with Adora. It had probably been since birth if she was being honest with herself.

"Eh, would have been worse if you puked on your letterman. It's mostly white that would have been there until you died. You would have to explain it to your grandchildren."

"Shit I didn't even think about that. I just wore that because girls love it," Adora smiled, a weird knowing smile that put Catra on edge.

"Yeah they do, how many people asked you to homecoming again?" Mermista looked curious, but Catra knew what she was doing. She was trying to get Catra jealous. It wouldn't matter much considering Catra was jealous of all of Adora's friends just for getting her time, her love, her energy. She knew what it meant when Adora devoted herself to a person, she would do anything and everything to make sure they didn't want anything. Adora always put herself second to her friends, it was just in her nature.

"I think Glimmer said it was fifteen this time," Adora looked flustered. Adora had never been comfortable with people asking her out. They had started in middle school, hopelessly pining for her when she was oblivious. Catra had only ever been asked out as a joke, which would have hurt but she had rejected them all before she knew. She didn't want to take away from her time with Adora. How pathetically in love she had been, keeping herself away from potentially happy relationships just because she couldn't bear to be without Adora.

"Sprinkles said? What you can't keep track yourself?" Catra scoffed.

"There's not really a need to keep track of people who I'm not interested in. Glimmer just likes it for bragging rights about how cool I am or something. I just feel bad that I hurt their feelings, I don't want to be reminded." Adora looked down at her phone before texting someone back.

"Your mom mad that you didn't come home?" Mermista asked sympathetically.

"No, Glimmer covered for me I think. It was Glimmer asking when I'm going home but I don't really want to go," Adora groaned. She slid her head onto the counter in defeat.

"Trouble in paradise?" Catra snickered.

"Ugh yeah _duh_. I'm sure you saw Glimmer stewing, she's still pissed at Bow. Still better than living with Lonnie though."

"Anything is better than living with Lonnie," Catra smirked.

"No, she's calling me! I'm gonna go guys. It was fun but Glimmer is probably going to lose her mind soon," Adora sighed, pulling herself up.

"Good fucking luck with Glimmer, you're going to _need_ it," Mermista looked at Adora grimly. Catra wasn't sure why the both of them acted like Glimmer had the power to ruin lives but Catra hadn't seen it, even when she was actively harassing the kid. Catra would even go so far as to say she was _fun_ to piss off. But that girl was all bark no bite. Adora was probably scared of her because she hated accessing her feelings even if it was for a second.

 

 

 

Catra woke up on her stomach on the floor. Her entire body ached, head pounding. When she tried to stand she felt dizzy so she stayed where she was. Looking up at the bed Mermista seemed to be in a similar state but on her back. Catra couldn't even remember if the night had been fun. She assumed it was because when she was an angry drunk she would just storm out and pass out on a park bench somewhere. She was glad she hadn't done that because she still didn't know the area that well. She would have woken up lost and thirsty with very few options of who to contact to come to get her.

Catra looked slowly over the room that had clothes thrown everywhere, DVDs littering the floor. She hoped they hadn't done some kind of 80's shopping montage based on all the old movies on the ground. There were still containers opened on the dresser and the windowsill. Catra couldn't remember when they had stopped. She had needed this, a time to just let go but she didn't think she would go this hard. It was probably because it was just her and Mermista. She didn't have to keep her guard up like she would at the party. Mermista was going to be popular in college it was almost like she was immune to the alcohol at some point.

"Fuck!" Mermista cried, scrambling to the edge of the bed.

"What? Did we have sex or something?" Catra joked. She slowly sat up on her elbows to look up at her distraught friend.

"Way worse. I _wish_ I had slept with you instead of this disaster!" Mermista handed Catra her phone. It was dozens of texts to Sea Hawk, telling him he looked handsome at homecoming and how much Mermista liked him. "Why would you let me do _that_?"

"Hey, I was _drunk_ , this isn't my fault. You said he knows how you feel so why do you care?"

"I don't want him to get a big head. Last time I let him know I liked him he set our boat on fire in the tunnel of love at the fair. I'm banned from there now which is bullshit," Mermista groaned, "Plus feelings are _gross_."

"Agreed," Catra chuckled as she handed Mermista her phone back.

"You should probably check yours too."

"Yeah, I don't drunk text people."

"We might have been egging each other on, you should probably check it." Mermista fell back on the bed, throwing her phone to the other end. Catra opened her phone and went to check her text messages.

"Fuck!"

"Fucking told you! What did you say to her?" Mermista laughed.

"I'm so fucked," Catra's heart was racing. _Why did drunk her have to be so stupid and desperate?_ She was still scrolling through the messages. There were so many emojis and flirty sentences. What was she thinking? Why had she gotten drunk after she spent the night cuddling with Adora? What was wrong with her?

"You can't be worse off than me," Mermista chuckled, sliding to the end of the bed.

"She asked when we can try kissing again and I replied 'whenever you want, baby' with a wink emoji. What the fuck am I going to do?" Catra groaned, "And it's obvious from context she remembers _everything_ we talked about when she was wasted. I was really banking on her not remembering." Catra collapsed on the floor wishing she was dead.

"That wouldn't be so bad would it?"

"Uh, yeah it would be bad. I'm in love with her _remember_?"

"You could enjoy it while it lasts. I make out with Sea Hawk all the time but nothing has changed. If she starts asking too many questions just tell her you're not looking for anything serious. That way you can still keep your distance."

"That is some high-level tsundere shit," Catra commented.

"Duh, that's our style. Pretend we don't have feelings for people so we don't get hurt. So far it's worked pretty well for me. Not to mention you would still get to make out with Adora, at least for a little while." Catra couldn't tell if Mermista was somehow conspiring to get her and Adora together. She most likely wasn't, she was too wrapped up in her on again off again relationship with Sea Hawk. Plus from what Catra had gathered, Mermista just _really_ liked to make out, even making out with that girl Perfuma a couple of times early in high school.

 _So you were_ **_really_ ** _drunk last night._ Adora texted her, probably because she saw the receipt that Catra had read her latest message.

 _Yup wasted._ Catra didn't want to have this conversation. But she couldn't let this opportunity pass even if she came to regret it. She had to try one more time, she had to remember what Adora's lips felt like. She wanted that feeling etched into her brain, so deep she would remember it on her death bed. _But I would like to try again if you want._

_Promise you won't run away this time?_

_Yeah, I promise._ She didn't know why she was doing this.

_And you promise you won't drop me?_

_Yeah, I promise._ She was just going to get her heart broken again. Adora was just using her, why she wasn't sure. But she knew this wasn't going to end well. She already had nothing to lose but she at least had one thing to gain.

_Behind the bleachers after school? We have a shorter football practice, only thirty minutes to brief us about the away game._

_See you there Princess._ Catra wanted to beat herself over the head.

"You better tell me how it is. People at this school would _pay_ money to know what kissing Adora is like," Mermista smirked.

"No way in hell. That's just for me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, another chapter! I just really wanted Catra to be able to get drunk lol. Mermista is conniving and I love her for it, brotp all the way! Stay tuned for the next chapter which is Adora! 
> 
> I love all your comments, you're all so nice to me it gives me life <3


	10. I Don't Want To Be Your Friend I Wanna Be Your Bitch

Adora was regretting her decision to invite some friends over instantly. Mermista and Perfuma had rushed over, though Mermista was a bit slower. That wasn't surprising since she looked like death (probably from all the drinking) and she didn't have a car. Part of Adora wished she could just do this with Glimmer and Bow but since they were fighting she didn't have much of a choice. She also didn't want to listen to Glimmer question her life choices for hours as she tried to explain why she finally wanted to try and put makeup on. It wasn't that she really  _ wanted  _ to, it was that she was nervous. Catra always looked  _ perfect _ and she had almost put Adora in cardiac arrest when she had shown up to the dance looking like  _ that _ . The anxious part of Adora was worried that when Catra got up close and personal tomorrow she would realize she was _ way  _ too pretty for her. Catra would probably give her that evil villain laugh she had and walk away.  _ Did you really think I would  _ **_ever_ ** _ be interested in you? _

No, for this she was going to need some slightly more supportive friends. Perfuma was a walking positivity blog; Mermista wasn't going to be the  _ most _ supportive but she already knew why Adora would have a sudden interest in makeup. She was sure that Catra had probably told her what was going on. It made Adora a little jealous but she pushed it away. Even though Mermista was neutral when it came to the two of them (though she did seem to lean on Catra's side from time to time), Mermista wasn't going to be as judgemental as Glimmer. Mermista had her own strange relationship problems that everyone knew about so she couldn't say much without Adora embarrassing her over Sea Hawk. Especially since Adora had caught them on a date together not long ago and hadn't told anyone, not even Glimmer. So here were her two friends, huge makeup cases and makeup store bags in hand terrifying her with all the prospective goop she was going to put on her face. But she had a notebook out so that would help her to remember all the steps they told her.

"So I didn't have anything your shade,  _ duh _ , so I picked you up some stuff," Mermista started pulling different items out of her shopping bag.

"This is so exciting! I never thought I'd see the day when Adora would put makeup on!" Perfuma squealed. It made Adora cringe.

"Yeah,  _ weird _ change of heart," Mermista gave her a knowing look, that implies that she could spill Adora's secret if she really wanted to. Adora hoped the way she was looking at her was enough to convey how much she didn't want her to do that.

"So what's so special about Tuesday Adora? Do you have a date or something?" Perfuma was oblivious as always. It was endearing at times. Not this time.

"Sort of," Adora admitted, "But you  _ can't _ tell anyone!" 

"I won't, don't worry. I know that would turn into a massacre with all the people chasing after you. She must be pretty special though," Perfuma was smiling and digging through her makeup. 

"She is," Adora smiled. Catra was the most important person in her life, she always had been. When they were little Adora had done whatever it took to make Catra laugh, notably when Catra was mad at her. Adora could never let that sit, could never bear the idea of her best friend being angry for too long. And her laugh was music to Adora's ears even now, even as it had gotten sharper over the years. 

"I mean I wouldn't call it a  _ date _ if you two are just going to make out under the bleachers," Mermista droned, piling specific things onto Adora's bed. 

"Aw, Adora I'm so proud of you! We didn't think you had it in you," Perfuma beamed. 

"I-it's not a date but maybe it could turn into one?" Adora spluttered, "I have to take my time. Catra isn't going to just  _ get over _ all her anger, I have to go one step at a time, meet her where she's willing to meet me. Gaining Catra's trust is  _ hard _ but it's worth it." 

"So you want to date her?" Mermista raised her eyebrow suspiciously.

"More than anything," Adora admitted. She balled her fists into the material of her pants, looking down and away from her friends. She hated being vulnerable, tears pricking the corners of her eyes.

"We'll help Adora! Mermista and I are  _ great _ at setting people up. We set those two teachers, Spinnerella and Netossa up! And they're getting married this coming spring!" 

"Yeah, we'll help. Don't make me regret it," Mermista's voice sounded vaguely threatening but also bored as she finished pulling things out of the bag, "I wasn't sure if you had dry or oily skin so I got you both options. And  _ lucky for you _ Perfuma and I have opposite skin types. Ready to get to work Perfuma?" 

"Absolutely! Are we going dramatic for the makeup? I noticed Catra always has dramatic winged eyeliner on and I'm not great at that but Mermista is!" 

"No! I mean... I want it to be unnoticeable you know? I don't want her to be able to tell." 

"Korean beauty trends it is then! Mermista said that's probably what you'd prefer anyway, your skin but better! I have plenty of stuff like that, I like that style better for myself." Adora pulled out her notebook and made a note so she could look up tutorials for later. Perfuma was great but she wasn't the most coherent. 

"I'm going to need you guys to explain the steps slowly so I can write all of it down," Adora felt exasperated. She still had a paper to work on before going to bed and she was going to have to get up extra early to put makeup on. 

"We already wrote you notes calm down," Mermista sighed.

"You guys are the best you know that?" Adora started tearing up a bit.

"Has Adora been crying more for you too?" Perfuma half whispered.

"I have not there's just something in my eyes!" 

"Yeah all the time, I've been calling it 'The Catra Effect'," Mermista half whispered back.

 

 

 

 

Catra was avoiding her, that much was obvious. She averted her gaze when she saw Adora in the hallway and in gym class. Adora wasn't complaining though because she was doing the same thing. She wasn't sure how to talk to Catra when she wanted to kiss her so bad. How do you tell someone who's angry with you that all you want is to hold them tight and kiss them until they become a puddle? Adora wasn't sure she would be able to hold a normal conversation with her until she kissed her. She may never be able to hold a normal conversation again. Glimmer had told her that she was incoherent this morning and Angella had agreed.

Her heart was pounding in her ears as she half listened to what her coach was telling her. She watched as Catra sat down on the bleachers, crossing her legs. Her eyes were challenging Adora. It was like she  _ knew _ her presence was driving Adora crazy. All she wanted to do was haul Catra under the bleachers. Why did she have to be a football player? It suddenly felt like a colossal waste of time. The more she looked at Catra the slower time seemed to go. Couldn't they have sent this dreck in an email? It was making this more exciting but it was also making her nervous. What if she was terrible at this? What if Catra had kissed other people before and noticed how bad she was at it? What if Catra didn't want to go on a date with her after this? She hadn't thought this through like she should have. Normally she planned everything excessively but when it came to Catra her mind when blank. 

Adora had run after practice was over. Lonnie had tried to talk to her and Adora had basically told her to shove it. She knew she would have to apologize later since she and Lonnie were finally getting on speaking terms but she was not going to let her ruin this. The last thing she wanted was for Catra to get bored and walk away. Adora wasn't going to lose what could be her only chance to kiss Catra again. She ignored the strange looks her teammates gave her as she had hastily bid them farewell and ran as fast as she could. 

" _ Hey, Adora _ . A little  _ eager _ are we?" Catra's voice could break Adora into pieces. Catra started circling her like she was prey. Adora gulped. She wanted to put an end to Catra's game but she didn't. There was something about it that was so undeniably attractive, irresistible. 

"I won't pretend I'm not," Adora could feel her voice shake. 

" _ Oh Adora _ , desperate really  _ does _ suit you," Catra chuckled. She made her way back to Adora's front, coming towards her so slowly it made Adora want to tear her hair out in frustration. 

"I don't know why you insist on torturing me Catra," Adora slipped up. She hated that she constantly gave Catra the upper hand. 

"Because you love it," Catra brushed a stray piece of blonde hair behind her ear, leaning in closer, "Are you wearing makeup?" Catra looked utterly confused like she couldn't process what she was seeing. 

"N-no!" Adora squeaked as Catra ran her finger across her cheek. 

"Psh, don't lie Adora. I  _ know _ what your face looks like. It's  _ cute _ that you're trying so hard," she smirked. Adora was getting tired of Catra's teasing. She wouldn't have put herself in this vulnerable position if this was all Catra was going to do. Adora's hand went to the back of Catra's head, stroking her hair. Catra looked up, clearly amused with herself.

"You always look perfect, I just wanted to look good for you," Adora stated. Catra's eyes went wide like she couldn't believe what she was hearing. Adora had never been more serious in her life. She lowered her head to kiss Catra. 

It started like the kiss at the dance, chaste but soft and warm. It sent butterflies through Adora's stomach and she put her other hand on the small of Catra's back, her hand in Catra's hair holding tight. Catra clearing wasn't in the mood for something more romantic like Adora had been hoping for because she deepened the kiss quickly, even slipping her tongue in Adora's mouth. It hit Adora then as she could barely string two thoughts together: she was in love with Catra. Adora knew kissing any girl would be pleasant. She had thought about it quite often since middle school, but kissing Catra was different. Catra had to one-up Adora, had to push Adora to the point of break. No matter how angry Catra was with her she always gave more than she got. Adora wasn't sure why she had left now because she couldn't imagine walking away from the benches. Her hand was wrapped tight in Catra's soft hair and the other was clutching her leather jacket. 

Catra pulled them apart and pushed Adora away, mismatched eyes looking wild as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. All of Adora was screaming to pull Catra back in, that she wasn't done. That she would never be done. Another part of her was screaming that she was in love with Catra and that was a  _ huge _ problem. Catra the wild child, Catra the dorky middle schooler who played the clarinet, Catra the girl she slept next to most nights. Suddenly most of her memories of her had a different meaning as she stood there, processing the fact that she had been in love with Catra for as long as she could remember. And here she was wiping spit of her mouth with desire in her eyes. If anyone had told Adora that a year ago she would have adamantly denied it. 

"That was  _ amazing _ ," Adora whispered breathlessly. Catra colored considerably but she didn't break eye contact. Adora knew Catra liked to be in control so even if she was mortified she wouldn't let Adora know it. Adora wished she could whisk Catra back into her arms and kiss her until she remembered what it was like to be vulnerable with Adora, to share every secret. 

"You're welcome Princess," Catra kept her signature smirk. It had never looked better on her than it did right then. Adora could die happy if this was her last moment. 

"We should do that again." Adora was determined not to let this die. Even if this was all she ever got from Catra she could live off this alone. With the close proximity, it almost felt like what they were doing was intimate. If they kept doing this Adora could convince herself this wasn't fake and that this wasn't a bad idea. She could pretend Catra had feelings for her back and live in her fantasy world until they graduated and went to different colleges. There would be a huge gaping hole in her heart that could never be filled but she would pretend there wasn't. What was therapy for if you didn't have big heartbreaking problems like this? Angella would be paying that kook for nothing if she didn't have a crisis at least once a week. This would be a crisis for a lifetime, that lady would never go out of business. 

"We have rehearsal on the field tomorrow. Meet me after that if you want." 

"Same place?" Adora took a step towards Catra who didn't back away, so she took that as a good sign so she kept walking closer. It would never be close enough she realized, even if Catra could absorb her it wouldn't be close enough. Catra reached up and ran her thumb across her lip. Adora's whole body felt like it was on fire. Catra was looking at her lips so intently as though she was memorizing the shape of them. 

"You have some of my lipstick on you," she hummed before leaning in for a quick kiss, "Same place." Adora was so excited she couldn't wait for it to come. Every second away from Catra was agony lately. She cursed herself for not being more passionate about the saxophone when she was in middle school. 

"Do I have a ton of black all over my face?" Adora chuckled. All of Catra's makeup was black. It was sexy that her lipstick was on her. She wanted other people to see, especially other girls she saw looking at Catra. She caught them staring and it made her blood boil. 

"Yeah, hope your friends taught you about makeup wipes," Catra kissed her on the cheek, giggling, "Don't be late!" She pulled away and started walking away, smile plastered across her face. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Season 2 my dudes!! That's why I'm posting a chapter at like 2 am, I'm too pumped honestly. Please leave a comment they make my day! I go back and look at them when I'm writing the new one. Be prepared for the next chapter which features Lonnie being a bitch. God, I love that girl. 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed Mermista and Perfuma's friendship (I wrote that part before season 2 dropped)! And some Catradora making out, I'm so happy for them. They need to talk though, dumb lesbians.


	11. Head Strong, I'll Take You On

The last few days had been pretty amazing. Adora had been desperate to make out with Catra the past few days and it was everything Catra had ever dreamed and more. Ever since Adora left all she had fantasized about, Adora being needy, realizing how much she needed her. It was wonderful, almost perfect, but it wasn't enough. She knew she could enjoy this for as long as possible but at some point, Adora would come to her senses and put a stop to it. She would have some great memories if nothing else. And some masturbation material.

Catra sat with her "friends" at lunch. She couldn't wait until school ended now. She had never liked school all that much in the first place, she had always wanted to leave. But now she had an even better reason to leave. It set her whole body on edge, especially when Adora kept giving her those looks. It made her want to haul Adora to the band closet. It wasn't a bad idea, then she would have two times and places to make out with her enemy. The thought brought a smile to her face even as Scorpia prattled on about Sparkles and her cooking club while Entrapta was getting food everywhere with her new electronic invention. Normally those things would drive her crazy to no end but she found herself easily distracted by all the emojis Adora was texting her.

"You've been in a great mood this week Catra! Did something good happen?" Scorpia asked excitedly. Scorpia had been significantly happier herself though Catra wouldn't comment on it. She had some decency and valued privacy, unlike her friends.

"Nope, nothing," Catra said as she ate the perfect sandwich Scorpia had packed for her.

"Are you sure? Your pupils have been dilating more and you've been flushed quite often," Entrapta noted, playing with her food more than eating it.

"Entrapta what have we talked about? You're not supposed to take notes on other people's bodily functions," Catra snarled.

"I know but Hordak disagrees with what you said about that! He says every great scientist records their findings." How was Catra supposed to argue with that? Go against the guardian who had all the money and most of the power? Not a smart move.

"Well it's still  _rude_ and I don't want you to do it to _me_ ," Catra grumbled, "Plus you act like I'm the only one who's been acting differently. You've both been acting weird too."

"That's just cuz I've been spending lots of time with Glimmer! It's nice to make friends, you should try it Catra! And Entrapta's been acting weird because she has a date Saturday,"

" _You_ have a date? How did _that_ happen?" Catra gasped incredulously. Entrapta of all people? If Scorpia had told her she was dating Sparky she wouldn't have batted an eyelash but Entrapta? Entrapta didn't seem to understand how people worked.

"It's more of a social experiment. I've never been on a date before and I was very curious. Perfuma is even going to let me take notes!" Catra didn't miss the hint of blush on Entrapta's face. Did Entrapta _actually_ have a crush on someone? It seemed impossible, even in the short amount of time Catra had known her.

"Perfuma? Isn't that one of _Adora's_ friends?" Catra pretended to be uninterested but she looked over at Adora's table. She was pretty sure Perfuma was the blonde hippie she had seen hanging out with Entrapta. Adora caught her looking at her and blushed which made Catra smirk. Adora didn't look away though.

"Yeah! You probably remember she won homecoming queen with Bow! She looked really pretty, right Entrapta?" Scorpia smiled a wide smile.

"I don't remember but since I always find her quite pleasing to look at I'm sure the dance was no different," Entrapta was more flustered than normal. She had a lot of manic energy and never was able to focus on one thing for very long. Talking about Perfuma was the most coherent she had been in months. Catra couldn't remember a single time since she met her that she had stayed on a topic this long.

"But didn't she go with that Bow guy? Why is she going on a date with you?" Catra wasn't trying to be rude. She was worried about Entrapta getting hurt. It could be one of those jokes popular people used to pull in middle school where they would pretend to ask someone like Entrapta out and humiliate them later. And it just made her more confused about Adora's friend group. Wasn't Princess Twinkles upset because Bow went on a date with Perfuma to homecoming?

"She said that was a friend date. They haven't gotten to know each other that well and they have a lot in common she said. Besides, I don't think this is a romantic date. It's probably another friend date," Entrapta confided. She looked disappointed and Catra did feel bad for her. She wanted to shake it away, but it made her angry that the flower girl could be hurting her friend for no good reason.

"You should ask her. She doesn't have a right to just _not_ tell you," Catra fumed. Why were all of Adora's friends like this? Even Mermista was noncommittal, though she was the poster child for that. The rest of Adora's friends looked mild in comparison to her but they all led people on. Especially Adora. Catra didn't know why she was letting Adora use her like this but she couldn't say no.

"I'm just glad to be going. I don't want to make it awkward. Besides, we're already friends so if it's a friend date that's fine too!" Entrapta was smiling but it didn't reach her eyes. Catra hadn't ever seen her so invested in someone. What was it about the hippie that attracted people? Catra couldn't see it. It was hard to believe Mermista had made out with her.

" _Hey, Catra_ ." Catra froze because the last person she expected to creep up behind her and say those _oh so familiar_ words was Lonnie. Lonnie leaned on one arm that was pressed far too close to Catra's food for her liking. Lonnie had her shit eating grin on and that was never a good sign.

"Lonnie, gotten so bored of your jock friends you're associating yourself with us? That's pretty _pathetic_ ," Catra commented. Lonnie had always driven her crazy. She had been stuck up since the day she was born. She was always trying to steal her spot with Adora, always trying to be a third wheel. She had joined in bullying Catra in middle school, though she seemed to get bored of it quickly. Living with Lonnie was a pain in the ass, so interacting at school was even worse.

"Actually I needed some advice Catra. I am having a _really_ hard time," Lonnie's tone was condescending as always. It made Catra want to punch her but she hadn't done that since middle school when she broke Lonnie's nose. She would pay to do that again.

"Catra's great at giving advice! She's so helpful, especially when I can't figure something out!" Scorpia beamed. Catra ignored Lonnie, glaring at Scorpia as she tried to concentrate on her food. Adora was giving her a sympathetic look from her table. She knew exactly how annoying Lonnie could be, even if she didn't hate her as much as Catra did. Adora was the type of person who could get along with anyone. Even when Lonnie pushed her buttons she still found a way to be friendly with her. Catra couldn't be friends with someone like her it just wasn't in her.

"Well, I was hoping she could give me some advice on what the best way to make out with Adora is. I just don't think I'm doing it right. Have any pointers _Catra_?" Catra stiffened. She knew Lonnie was probably messing with her. Since they were eleven Lonnie had teased her about wanting to marry Adora. This was just another cruel jab at her being a lesbian, like usual. Lonnie wasn't completely stupid, she knew that Catra was in love with Adora. And she always used it to her advantage.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Catra ground out. The mood of the table changed instantly, even Scropia going stiff.

"Aw, that's too bad. Adora is really _good_ at it, she does this thing with her _tongue_ -" Catra couldn't stop herself from punching Lonnie. She knew it was a terrible idea but it felt amazing. She punched her in the gut and decided headbutting her was a good idea. Catra barely noticed as other football players were coming to back Lonnie up because Scorpia started punching some of them. Entrapta accidentally hit one of them with her invention but look proud of herself anyways.

" _Catra what is going on_?" Adora yelled as she punched one of her own teammates. Now _that_ surprised Catra but it made her feel pretty damn good as she pushed Lonnie to the ground, ready to get a few cheap shots in.

"Stay out of it Adora!" Catra growled.

"No!" Adora yelled back. God Adora was annoying.

"I don't need you to _save_ me I've got it," Catra hissed, lifting Lonnie up by her collar. Lonnie still had that dumb smirk on her face but she had a bloody nose from Catra's headbutt.

"I didn't come over here to save you, I came to help out. Why can't you accept my help?" Adora sighed loudly, stopping another one from coming up to Catra.

"Again, not fucking needed princess, this is between me and Lonnie," Catra smashed Lonnie's face into all the food that Entrapta had gotten everywhere just in time for all the teachers to start pulling everyone apart. Whatever trouble Catra got into was going to be worth this memory being tattooed onto her brain for the rest of her life. She would be an eighty-year-old woman and she would be telling all the other old biddies at the nursing home about this.

  


* * *

 

 

 

Miraculously _no one_ was in trouble. Maybe it was because it was a weird hippie school where they were all expected to sing Kumbaya and hold hands. Maybe it was because none of them would squeal on each other, not even stuck up Lonnie who knew better. Any fighting between the orphans would have gotten them all in trouble and Lonnie and Catra always got the worst beatings comparatively. So the school was going to have a Mean Girls type assembly where they talk about how harmful bullying is and why they should all be friends. It was bullshit but Catra was glad she would miss out on another beating. She bet Lonnie was too.

A soft knock came at her door after dinner. It wasn't Scorpia because her knocks were loud as hell and she was forbidden to visit anyone after dinner because of it. Entrapta just let herself in so it wasn't her either. The last person Catra had thought would show up at her door was Lonnie, nose still red. Catra begrudgingly let her in and sat down on her bed, waiting for all this to be over. Lonnie would probably blackmail her for something in return for not snitching on her. Instead, Lonnie sat down next to her on the bed, looking just as uncomfortable as Catra felt.

"I'm not apologizing if that's what you're after," Catra spat.

"I started it, why should _you_ apologize?" Lonnie chuckled. That made Catra look at her. Lonnie was never nice to her, not even in the smallest amounts. Why in the hell would she start now?

"Why _did_ you start it?" Catra couldn't hide her curiosity. Lonnie had been leaving her mostly well enough alone since Adora left. Now that Catra thought about it, Lonnie mostly hung out with Rogelio and Scorpia but she hadn't been doing that as often either.

"I saw you and Adora making out and I wanted to mess with you," Lonnie giggled. Lonnie giggling was something new. She couldn't remember hearing that since they were kids. Lonnie had always been a serious kid, starting at age five or six. It was hard to remember her being silly or letting loose. She had her nose in the air since they were little, so high if it rained she would drown.

"Classic you," Catra retorted.

"Sorry I was a dick. For real. I wanted to say congrats. You've been pining after her since you were born. It was about time you two got together," Lonnie gave Catra a small smile, punching her lightly on the arm. Lonnie showing anyone affection was new.

"We're not together but thanks for the apology I guess."

"Why the fuck not? You two were _made_ for each other."

"Many reasons, not that they're any of your business."

"All I'm saying is you'd have to be an _idiot_ to let her slip away. She's a real catch, Catra."

"Were you into her?" Catra raised her brow at Lonnie. She had always been weird when it came to Adora but she had never liked Lonnie enough to ask. She had never wanted to think about it because it made her jealous and want to punch Lonnie even harder.

"Well yeah. But who wasn't you know? She just has that something about her. But none of us had a chance because you were always in the way and she's _crazy_ about you."

"No, she's not. That's one of the reasons we're not together. I'm a big fucking idiot and I fell in love with her knowing _damn well_ she's out of my league," Catra sighed, flopping down onto her back. She wouldn't have shared any of this with Lonnie if Lonnie hadn't already known. Lonnie had always known too much about Catra's feeling for her own good, using them against Catra most of the time.

"You're a god damn idiot," Lonnie groaned. She started rubbing her temples like she was getting a migraine.

"That's what Shadow Weaver always says so it _must_ be true."

"Is that the other reason? Shadow Weaver?"

"No shit. She'd skin me alive if she knew I was anywhere near her golden child. Probably put my hide up for sale as some kind of exotic animal pelt, make a killing on the black market."

"Look, I don't like _you_ that much but if you let Shadow Weaver stop you from being with a girl you've been crazy about _your whole life_ I'm going to punch you in the face. And then I'm going to steal her from you."

"Like you could," Catra snorted. Lonnie laughed and got up, walked towards the door.

"Seriously, stop being a dumbass. You two are driving me crazy. Also if you could get together by Winter Carnival that would be great, it would help me win a bet I have going."

"File your fucking complaints with Adora. I'm not the problem."

"You're _both_ the problem because you're _both_ fucking dumbasses and you share _one_ brain cell."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy, have some slight Lonnie and Catra bonding. I love Lonnie since the new season came out, I really hated her at first. Lonnie, the only one to get shit done. Next chapter is your regularly scheduled Catradora content.
> 
> Also, I just found the horizontal line tool and that's so important omg.


	12. Leave The Car Running I'm Not Ready To Go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, the scene idea that inspired this whole fic! This whole fic is based on Hurt Less by Julien Baker, so it's great to finally see this scene in here!

 

This day couldn't get any worse. Catra had tried calling everyone she could think of; Mermista was on a date, Scorpia said Shadow Weaver wasn't home. She had even called several band kids but they were all busy or hadn't answered. Catra was stranded and it was pouring rain. There was nothing Catra hated more than being wet and the thundering on top of it was spiking her anxiety. She couldn't walk all the way home, it was over five miles. She had no choice but to call Adora, who had all too happily told her she would be able to borrow the car and get her.  _ Joy _ . Adora had pulled up in a hatchback with a smile on her face. It made Catra want to punch her but she begrudgingly opened the passenger side door and took a seat, throwing her bag into the back. 

Catra was in a foul mood. She was having more problems with Shadow Weaver then she was willing to admit. Shadow Weaver (and Hordak to a lesser degree) were not happy with the list of colleges she wanted to apply to. She hadn't even told them and she wouldn't have told them. They had found out through her guidance counselor when she tried to get application fee waivers.  _ Stupid Catra _ , she should have just asked Hordak for money for something unrelated. Lied about needing reeds or something, he had  _ no concept _ of how much things cost. Nevertheless, she had gotten into a heated argument the night before. The last thing she wanted was to think about how Adora probably didn't even have to do more than mention where she wanted to go for school. Her new family probably high fived her when she told them her decisions and handed her a wad of cash. Kissed her on the cheek and asked if she wanted anything from Whole Foods. 

"So... am I taking you home?" Catra tensed. She wanted to punch something, to scream. Screaming at Adora would probably make her feel better but she knew this wasn't about Adora. Not everything in her life revolved around Adora no matter what everyone else thought.

"Can you just drive around for a while? I don't care where we go, I just  _ can't  _ go back home." Catra didn't mean for it to come out sulky but it did. She looked away from Adora and out the window. With her luck, Adora would either interrogate her or just drop her off at home. It was Catra's own fault for being disrespectful right? How dare Catra treat Shadow Weaver like that? She was just being a good guardian and Catra was difficult. That's what younger Adora would say. 

"Yeah, sure! Let me just text Angella and let her know," Adora whipped her phone out of the center console and started texting. Of course, Adora would keep her phone there. She was such a grandma, she couldn't risk being distracted in any way. 

"Why do you call her that?" 

"Her name?" Adora chuckled. 

"Yeah. You seem pretty close to her daughter so why wouldn't you call her mom or some shit?" 

"She's not my mom. I like her,  _ a lot _ ! But I'm not ready. I mean I knew Shadow Weaver my whole life and I  _ never  _ called her my mom." 

"You were the  _ only one _ she probably would have let call her that," Catra muttered, trying not to feel bitter about it. Shadow Weaver and Hordak had been very clear since they were little that they were not a family. They were not their parents and they were not siblings. If they caught anyone referring to them as such they would be in trouble. Catra wouldn't be surprised if they didn't let Timothy call them his parents when he was old enough to talk. They would probably have him call them ma'am and sir. Adora either didn't hear her because she was texting or elected to ignore her. She put her phone back in the center console and started to drive. Catra didn't care where she was just grateful they weren't going to her house. 

"So you still do gymnastics?" Adora asked after quite a while, obviously trying to start a conversation. Catra was not in the mood for any kind of conversation. 

"Well that  _ is _ where you picked me up from so you do the math," Catra rolled her eyes. Catra wasn't a huge fan of her new gymnastics coach or the other girls who went there. It was too far from her house. She missed her old Russian coach who was always down the street, the one who would pick Catra up and drop her off if Shadow Weaver was in a bad mood. She yelled at her like she was used to, trained her as if she would be in the Olympics. Instead, she was stuck with some suburban yoga mom who asked them all about their feelings and told them competition wasn't everything. It made Catra want to barf. 

"Okay, what's going on with you? You're usually snarky but you're not like  _ this. _ Something is bothering you," Adora had parked the car at a place that looked like teens went there to make out. Catra would have been flattered but she was not in the mood. She was sore from practice and her throat hurt from yelling the night before. She was pretty sure the whole neighborhood heard them fighting. Even Hordak had raised his voice telling her that she was wasting her potential with music. 

"I don't think that's any of your business  _ Adora _ ." 

"Catra can you just talk to me? If something is going on with Shadow Weaver maybe I can help-"

"That's  _ so _ like you Adora. You think you can just swoop in after you  _ abandoned _ me and play the hero. Poor Catra can't do  _ anything _ for herself, I'm just going to save her! Every hero needs a sidekick  _ right _ ?" Catra spat. She was finally looking Adora in the eye but all she wanted to do was storm out of the car. She wanted to walk right off that cliff that was in front of them and never look back. 

"I don't think those things Catra, I just want to help because I care about you!" 

"Well, you have a funny way of showing it!" Catra yelled back. She could feel tears pricking at the corners of her eyes and it made her want to rip Adora's throat out. Adora shouldn't have any sway over her feelings after all she had put her through. All the lonely nights and all the wishing she would come back. All the heartache as she kicked herself for crying every night, crying over someone who would never love her back. 

 

Adora sat there, face forward as Catra fought the tears running down her face. She had promised herself she wouldn't cry in front of Adora but she hadn't been able to control herself. She had been holding them in most nights since the move. It didn't serve any purpose; it didn't make her feel better. If anything it just made her angrier; angry at Adora, angry at her living situation, angry at the world. Tonight she just felt empty and tired. She was so tired of being angry and sad. Tired of fighting against a system that was against her from the start. 

"I didn't  _ want _ to abandon you," Adora whispered. Her fists were balled up on her thighs, her voice was tight and strained like she was trying to keep herself from crying. 

"But you  _ did _ . You left me there with  _ her _ . You  _ knew _ how she would react to you leaving and you did it anyway. Who do you think took the fall for you, Adora?" Catra choked out. 

"I  _ tried _ . I-I tried to get you adopted but Angella said she could only handle one more and none of her friends wanted to adopt a teenager," Adora started crying, furiously wiping away tears, "And I called and called. I wrote you letters, I even tried to stop by but every time she said you weren't home. And the last time they said you were moving and I thought I would  _ never  _ see you again." Adora was full on sobbing. Catra wanted to comfort her but she couldn't bring herself to. 

"Y-you're lying. Don't fucking  _ lie _ to me," Catra hiccuped around her tears. She desperately needed to blow her nose. Adora pulled some napkins out of her center console and handed them to her, taking some for herself to blow her own nose. 

"I'm not Catra I swear. I called your cellphone and after a little bit, it said your number was disconnected. The same thing happened to the house phone. I thought you were just ignoring my letters, I didn't know what else to do." It was getting harder to understand Adora, her words coming out with a croaking sound, pauses between her words. Catra couldn't think of another time since early middle school when she had seen Adora this bad. Suddenly something clicked for Catra. Catra remembered them getting new phones but they all got new phone numbers. Shadow Weaver had blamed it on switching carriers. She had also said she got rid of the home phone because it was a waste of money not long after that. Catra hadn't thought anything of it. She hadn't thought that Shadow Weaver was actively trying to keep her and Adora apart until Catra's rage was bubbling over. That would ensure that Catra wouldn't want to see Adora even if they did end up in the same school district. 

"I believe you," Catra whispered. 

` "You do?" Adora choked on her tears and finally turned to face Catra. Her face was puffy and swollen. 

"I should have figured that Shadow Weaver was keeping us apart. She always said I held you back. She hated how close we were," Catra muttered. She was just sniffling now, grateful that the tears had stopped at least for the moment. She preferred the anger that was pricking her over and over to the crying and the sadness. 

"Hey, I should have figured that out too. I'm such an idiot," Adora sighed. 

"Why did you keep spending so much time with me even though she hated it? You loved  _ her _ , you would have done anything for her. But you still hung out with me." 

"Because I love you more than I love her. I  _ always _ have," Adora whispered. She reached her hand cautiously to weave her hand through Catra's hair, putting her hand on Catra's face. Catra leaned into it, though she knew she shouldn't. She tried to ignore the way Adora's words made her feel, tried to remind herself that Adora didn't mean it the way she hoped. She closed her eyes and just let herself enjoy it for a moment. Adora pulled forward and gave her a gentle kiss, different from what they'd been doing this past week. It made Catra's heart flutter, made her uncomfortable how happy it made her.

"That's gay," Catra chuckled, pulling away to look at Adora.

"Well yeah, we're both gay," Adora laughed. 

"Thank god, could imagine being  _ straight _ ?" Catra wrinkled her nose. She knew that Adora thought it was cute when she did that because she had said so often in middle school. Adora smiled wider, hand moving to Catra's hair. 

"So are you going to tell me what's going on or?" Adora's gaze moved downwards, not looking Catra in the eyes anymore. Catra knew talking about real things made Adora nervous. 

"It's stupid, same shit different day. They're just mad because they don't like the colleges I'm applying to, surprise surprise! I can handle it." Catra knew she was deflecting. She didn't want to talk about her feelings about Shadow Weaver. They were complicated like most things in her life.

"Let me guess, the whole you're  _ wasting your potential _ speech right?" Adora gave a knowing smile. 

"Psh, like she ever did that speech with you." 

"She did! Remember when we were in middle school and I wanted to join the art club? She gave me the same speech every morning and night for over a week until I told her I didn't want to join anymore. I'm surprised you don't remember that." 

"We were in what, sixth grade? That was the only time she ever gave you that speech though. You could probably recite it from memory though with all the times she recited it to the rest of us." 

"She also gave me the speech when she found out I was getting adopted. She combined it with the 'you're disappointing me' and the 'why would you hurt me after I raised you' speeches too." 

"Not surprised, she cried when you left. I thought I was going to die. We all hid in our rooms for over a week. She was drinking twice as much for almost a month." 

"I'm really sorry about that," Adora sighed.

"Not your fault she's obsessed with you." Adora looked up into her eyes once again, a small grateful smile on her face. 

"Hey, uh, I'm actually having a really great time with you tonight despite all the crying and yelling. Do you maybe want to sleep over my house tonight? That way you don't have to go back to Shadow Weaver." Catra's heart started to accelerate. She had slept in the same bed as Adora many times but it was  _ different _ now. Even if Adora wasn't interested in her romantically she was definitely attracted to her. It would be a very awkward night of sexual tension. It would still be better than another night with Shadow Weaver.

"What about your sister?" Catra raised her brow. Glimmer hated Catra and Catra felt the same way. Glimmer was an annoying spoiled baby and Catra couldn't look at her for more than a few moments.  Catra doubted she would be thrilled to spend the night with her. Twinkles would probably watch her all night so she didn't hurt her precious sister's feelings.

"She and Bow are still fighting so I'm sure he's going to be at our house when we get there. They'll probably be arguing in her room until Angella kicks him out around 11. Glimmer won't even notice you're there." 

"Your new life is weird, I want you to know that," Catra chuckled. 

"I know, I know. It took a long time for me to get used to it too. So are you going to sleep over my house or not?" Adora giggled. 

"Sure, why the hell not?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys are amazing! I woke up to 17 comments on the last chapter and it meant everything to me! Also, this fic having more than 3000 views means everything to me! I hope you're enjoying the Catradora love heating up a bit! I'm excited about the next chapter! Please leave a comment it makes my day :)


	13. I'm A Little Bit Lost Without You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra sleeps over.
> 
> Jennifer's Body spoilers for those of you who haven't seen it!

Adora wasn't sure  _why_ she thought this was a good idea. Everything about it felt like when they were kids, sneaking in through a window especially brought back all kinds of nostalgic feelings. Nothing had worked out great when they did this kind of thing as children. It was sending all of Adora's nerves through the roof. Catra in her room was something that felt so natural but so terrifying at the same time. Catra looking through her movies was familiar but it sent her heart soaring through the air of the room. She tried to get herself together as she searched for pajamas for Catra. She thought she had some of Catra's old clothes and she was right, pulling out some band tees and shorts from the back of her pajama drawer. Adora noticed Catra jump when the lightning cracked down not too far from their house. Catra had always been afraid of thunderstorms as kids, it was why Catra started to sneak into her room as children. 

"When did you get so many bad movies?" Catra scoffed. Adora could tell Catra was trying to blow off how anxious she was about the storm. 

"Half of them are Glimmers. This used to be her movie and craft room before I got here," Adora chuckled. She handed Catra her old clothes. Would she still change in front of her? How would that _work_? Adora wanted everything to go back to the way it was between her and Catra but at the same time she didn't. In their old life, Adora never would have had a chance with Catra because Shadow Weaver would have found out. They wouldn't be able to keep it a secret if they had lived together. Someone would have found out and almost everyone they lived with had big mouths. The little demon child was known for repeating whole conversations and he _loved_ to repeat Catra the most. Catra had inadvertently taught him his first swear and he had loved the reactions he had gotten, shouting at the top of his lungs for the next several days until everyone lost interest.

"Psh, _spoiled much_? No accounting for _taste_ , I see, it's all romantic comedies," Catra laughed, "Aw you kept the clothes I let you borrow. That's _cute_ Adora." 

"Of course I kept them! I didn't have much of you to bring with me. And hey, Love Simon is a good one! A lot of them are trash but not that one." Adora felt embarrassed that she kept everything of Catra she could. She had almost stolen some of her things just so she could look at them when she moved. She had kept a lot of the photos she gave Catra close to her heart but she had a feeling Catra needed them more. She still missed them, she wished she had made copies of them.

"Gay ones are acceptable but she has way too many with Adam Sandler," Catra's face displayed her disgust just as much as her voice did. Her nose wrinkled up in that adorable way that made Adora want to kiss her. "Do you have any horror movies that I _haven't_ seen? It seems like you just had your mom buy all the ones we used to watch together." 

"Uh... that's because I did? I missed you," Adora threw her behind her head trying to hide her embarrassment, "Have you seen Jennifer's Body? It's not scary but it's a good movie." 

"Glad to see you were devastated without me," Catra grinned, "We can watch that one, I haven't seen it yet." 

"Awesome! I'll go downstairs, pop some popcorn and tell Angella you're here while you change," Adora noticed the way Catra raised her brow like she couldn't believe Adora was being so weird about this. But she shrugged after a moment of staring at Adora, starting to peel her shirt off as Adora bolted out of the room. Adora could hear the cackling laugh come from her room even as she descended the stairs. Why did Catra have to be such a tease? Adora didn't remember her being this flirtatious before she moved. She had always clung to Adora but she had never tried to hit on her or anyone else if she thought about it.

Adora could hear Bow and Glimmer arguing loudly even as she made her way to the kitchen. They had been doing this every night since the dance. Neither one of them wanted to apologize. Well, that wasn't true, Bow knew he had nothing to apologize for so it was just him waiting for Glimmer to be the bigger person. Adora was pretty sure that wasn't going to happen any time soon. For every time she told Glimmer she should apologize, there were at least three more times where Scorpia told Glimmer she was completely in the right. Adora was pretty sure Scorpia would take anyone's side if she liked them enough but it was inflating Glimmer's sense of betrayal and Adora did not appreciate it.

Angella was sitting at the table, mug in hand. If she wasn't drinking Adora pitied her, listening to her daughter and Bow argue into the night. She shot her a shy smile as she grabbed a couple of bags of popcorn and unwrapped one, throwing it in the microwave. The last thing she wanted to do was have this conversation with Angella but she didn't quite feel right sneaking Catra into her house and _not_ telling her. 

"I didn't hear you come home, Adora. Possibly because of all of the shouting that goes on in this house now," Angella commented. She looked quite dead inside like she was contemplating all of her life choices. "How did bringing Catra home go?" Angella was aware there was quite a bit of tension left between Catra and Adora. She had been surprised Adora had asked for the car for that purpose but had agreed nonetheless.

"Uh, about that. Is it okay if she stays over tonight? She's _really_ afraid of thunderstorms and Mrs. Hordak isn't the most comforting." Adora felt bad springing this on Angella at the last minute. With any luck, Angella would get mad and kick both of them out of her house. 

"I have nothing against it. Bow comes over whenever Glimmer pleases so it would be quite hypocritical to deny you. The only thing I ask is no arguing after I kick Bow out. They've given me enough of a headache for one day, I don't need you two to add to it." 

"Of course ma'am. I think Catra and I already got out all our arguing earlier. We're just planning to watch a movie, have a low key kind of night," Adora promised, putting a second bag in the microwave.

"Good, someone in this house should relax. Lord knows I would love to," Angella sighed, taking a long drink out of her cup. There was always something about Angella that made her uncomfortable. She was sure it was probably just her problems with authority figures and the weight of this woman controlling her entire financial life. More than likely it was because of her desperate need for approval from mother figures. That and every compliment she had ever received from her previous caretaker had a thinly veiled threat attached to it. Angella wasn't like that but it was still hard to remind herself that Angella had never hurt her, never neglected her, never withheld money, attention, or affection from her. She was a normal mom. She could be strict with Glimmer but it was because Glimmer got in trouble. 

"You should try to relax ma'am. I know it's hard with the yelling but maybe you could kick him out earlier? You deserve a day off too." Adora sincerely meant it. It felt like Angella was always answering an email or a phone call, never off work even when she was off work. And all the single parenting she had to do didn't help matters. She looked like she hadn't slept in ages. 

"Perhaps I will Adora. Now, don't let me keep you. It's been ages since you've spent time with a friend that you didn't have to share with Glimmer. You should enjoy yourself. It will only be a matter of time before Bow and Glimmer have made up and start sticking their noses in your business." Adora didn't have to be reminded. If Bow and Glimmer had any idea of what Adora had been doing with Catra or even knew that Catra had slept over they would insert themselves into her business. Adora was enjoying her time so much with Catra the last thing she wanted was for someone else to question why she was doing it. Glimmer would no doubt be mortified and disapprove heavily. Bow would ask intrusive questions about her feelings. She didn't want that, she didn't want to have to examine why she was risking heartbreak, she just wanted to do it. This might be her last chance to mend her relationship with Catra, she didn't want to examine all the ways she could get hurt.

"I think I will. It's been a long time since we got to spend time together," Adora smiled, more to herself than to Angella. Adora was looking forward to Catra pointing out all the flaws with the movie, telling her how it wasn't scary. Most of the movies they had watched together weren't scary. Adora almost wished she had picked a scary one so she could cling to Catra like they used to.

* * *

 

Adora stood outside her own door for too long. She could still hear the shouting but that wasn't the only thing setting her nerves on fire. Everyone in her old home had called her brave constantly, but Catra knew the truth. Adora was afraid. She was afraid of just about everything. Most things she did were in avoidance, she knew that now that she was in therapy. She tried to remind herself that she did do a couple of brave things. Refusing to stop spending time with Catra had been a huge deal. Adora knew Shadow Weaver could have hurt them both at any time, she was increasingly violent the older they got. But she had held her ground. What was so terrifying about Catra? Adora loved her, had known her all her life. But this aspect of Catra was different. She had never thought of her in a romantic way(at least not consciously) until recently but she never thought of anyone that way. She was probably too busy being afraid. Catra wasn't going to hurt her, at least not physically. She was just going to tease her, she had to remind herself that.

Adora entered her room to Catra in the clothes she gave her, rummaging through her stuff. It was very like Catra to go through her things, she was always doing it when they lived together. Whether it was Catra stealing her chapstick or borrowing some socks that would never return despite her best efforts, she was always in her space. It made Adora relax considerably. She was worried everything would be totally different between them forever now but it didn't appear that way.

"Fuck Adora you took forever. I thought Sprinkles accidentally killed you when she was trying to murder Croptop. Also since when do you wear _dresses_?" Catra was holding a pink lacy dress with her eyebrow raised. 

"I don't, Glimmer had some weird ideas about what getting a sister would be like," Adora rolled her eyes. She handed Catra one of the bags of popcorn. Catra had already put the movie in Adora's laptop so Adora sat down on her bed and waited for Catra before pressing play. They sat in silence for a bit and it made Adora uncomfortable. She hated how everything made her nervous. If Catra hadn't been right there she would just get her panic attack medication but she didn't want to have that conversation right this second. Or ever if she was being honest with herself.

"So, Meghan Fox is pretty hot huh?" Adora had a difficult time keeping her voice calm. She wanted to change the mood somehow. She hated how awkward she felt. She and Catra weren't touching like they used to and it was driving her crazy.

"Eh, I'm more of an Amanda Seyfried girl myself," Catra gave her a knowing look that set all of Adora's nerves reeling. Catra's tone had been casual but her look was anything but. It made her want to kiss her. 

 

* * *

 

"Everything ok?" By the end of the movie, Catra had a deep scowl on her face. Adora wasn't sure why. She didn't think she had done anything wrong, the movie wasn't scary. They had been uncharacteristically quiet during the movie, but it seemed like Catra was trying to focus on the plot.

"I liked the movie-" Catra started, trailing off in exasperation.

"But?"

"Needy is an _idiot_ for killing Jennifer. She was _obviously_ in love with her. I mean if you told me that you had to kill boys to live I sure as hell wouldn't stop you." Catra almost immediately realized what she had said and bristled like she always did, becoming flustered.

"You would let me kill guys as long as you got to make out with me? I knew you cared!" Adora laughed. Catra got more embarrassed, puffing herself up like she had something to prove.

"Ew, get over yourself!" She threw a pillow at Adora half-heartedly. 

"No way, you missed me! You're not leaving until you admit it!" Adora reached over and started tickling Catra, which resulted in them struggling as Catra made high pitched squeaking noises. 

"I didn't miss you! Adora this is cheating!" Catra was laughing and her eyes were watering. Adora found an opening and pinned Catra down, tickling her further, eliciting a shrill scream, "Fine I missed you!" Adora couldn't help but laugh as she stopped tickling Catra. After a moment she realized she was still on top of her. As she made a move to get off, Catra grabbed her wrist. Adora stared down into mismatched eyes and could feel both of their hearts beating out of control as Catra took her hand into her own. The three most dangerous words Adora could say almost came tumbling out of her mouth as she looked down at Catra. Catra looked beautiful, her hair fanned out on the bed. The way she was looking at her made Adora want to memorize every inch of her. 

"Hey," Adora whispered. If Catra felt bashful about the compromising position she didn't show it. 

"Come here," Catra pulled her down closer, crashing their lips together. Adora let out a sound she hadn't known she was holding in. She could feel Catra smile against her lips. She knew Catra was proud of what she did to Adora. Adora felt the same way as Catra let out a soft groan underneath her, Catra's other hand snaking into her hair. Catra pressed up against her and Adora's mind started spinning. She knew she could just keep kissing Catra but she couldn't.

"Catra, what is this?" Adora looked down at her. Even though she was straddling Catra, she knew she didn't have any of the power. Catra looked annoyed that she had pulled away. 

"Uh, making out? We've done it a bunch of times Adora." Catra was making the "I'm judging you for being stupid" face. It made Adora want to backflip into her closet and shut the door.

"No, I mean, what are we exactly?" Adora motioned from herself to Catra with her free hand. 

"Enemies who make out," Catra stated like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"I don't think enemies is the right word, maybe rivals?" Adora struggled to find a word that wouldn't scare Catra away. That wasn't the word she wanted. But it hadn't been the answer she wanted either.

"Whatever makes you feel better Princess." Catra looked away but didn't let go of her hand. Adora could tell she wanted to say something but she was holding it in. Adora could remember many times where Catra had looked at her like that. 

"Are you sure?" Adora tried to hide the hope in her voice. 

"Duh," Catra still wouldn't look at her. 

"Okay," Adora couldn't hide the crestfallen sound in her voice. There was a pit in her throat that she couldn't chase away. Catra must have noticed because she finally looked at her. She looked frustrated, conflicted. Adora knew she was still angry with her. Even if she had any positive feelings for Adora she wasn't ready to tell her. Adora knew she had to be an idiot to think Catra would like her back. Catra could have anyone she wanted. Adora was desperate to keep the shred of Catra that wanted her at this moment. Catra flipped Adora onto her back and closed the distance between them, giving her a soft kiss.

"You think too much," Catra commented. Her hand was in Adora's hair, pulling it out of its ponytail. She carefully ran her hands through it before moving her attention to the peach fuzz that was Adora's undercut.

"Yeah," Adora chuckled. She rested a hand on Catra's hip. It was bony, just as it had always been.

"We better turn in. I'm sure you need your beauty sleep," Catra rolled her eyes as she rolled off Adora, still facing her as she laid next to her. "I bet you still get up at 5 am."  

"Nope, 4:45 am. Just like when I lived with you," Adora smiled. 

"I still have no idea why you got up for _my_ shower time. You could have slept at least another hour," Catra grumbled. 

"Maybe I wanted to see your dumb face," Adora grinned. 

"Well don't expect me to get up that early tomorrow Princess. I _will_ kill you if you try," Catra yawned, inching closer to Adora before cuddling up to her. Adora hesitantly put her arm around Catra and wiggled a bit to get comfortable. 

"I wouldn't dream of it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof kids the ending was so hard to write. Catra loves her so much but she is terrified. My poor baby, I adore her. I didn't forget about this fic! It's all planned out, I'm just taking a math class for school so my brain is fried.


	14. Am I Made Of Stone?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alternative title for this chapter: Shadow Weaver is a manipulative slut

"This is a _bad_ idea," Scorpia whispered, standing outside the door. 

"Couldn't fucking agree more," Lonnie yelled from down the hall. 

"For the last time, I didn't ask _either of you_ to stand watch for me," Catra yelled from inside Shadow Weaver's room. She didn't want them to get in trouble because of her but they had both insisted. Catra was surprised Lonnie wanted to stick her neck out but they seemed to have an understanding lately. And when she heard Shadow Weaver had "cockblocked Catra" as she put it, she had enthusiastically volunteered, though Catra had noticed the fear in her eyes. Scorpia, not to be outdone by Lonnie had half-heartedly agreed. When Catra insisted she didn't have to, Scorpia suddenly became more insistent that as her "best friend" she had to be there for her. So there they were, the two of them watching the hallway and Catra digging through Shadow Weaver's things. 

"You'd be fucked if we didn't _Catra_ ," Lonnie shouted, "And you _better_ tell me about your sleepover with Adora as payment or I'mma beat your ass." 

"I'm not telling you shit Lonnie!" 

"You're telling me though right," Scorpia poked her head around the corner expectantly. 

"I told _both of you_ it's none of your damn business. I need to focus, can you both shut up?" Catra was rummaging through the trunk at the end of Shadow Weaver's bed. If anywhere in her creepy room had secrets it had to be there right? Catra had always known Shadow Weaver was weird but she was a lot _stranger_ than she thought. There were so many baby pictures of Adora it was sickening. Shadow Weaver only had _one_ baby picture of her. It was surprising that she had any at all with the way that woman hated her. 

Catra was getting frustrated by this point. She had dug through all of the other furniture and the closet. She had even looked under the bed (because if you're going to keep a secret it's probably under your bed) but the last place was this godforsaken trunk. It was far too big and filled to the brim with Adora keepsakes. There were a lot of other pictures of another little boy, probably one of Shadow Weaver's previous fosters. If Catra didn't know any better, she thought it looked suspiciously like Sparkles. That wasn't what she was risking her skin for. She wanted the letters Adora wrote to her. With her luck, Shadow Weaver probably burnt them all or threw them away. Just as she considered giving up she found something that looked promising and she was right. 

There was a huge bundle tied together with string. The envelope on the top said "Catra" in Adora's delicate handwriting. _Fuck, they even smell like her_ , Catra thought. She carefully started to unwrap them. The envelopes were pink stationery, return address clearly a Brightmoon address. Catra could feel her eyes welling up with tears and she tried to push them back. She would read them later, she wanted to remember every word, laugh at every dumb thing Adora said, soak up every bit of Adora's desperation for her to answer. Then she would put them with the photos Adora gave her and all her own photos of them she had kept from before as well. 

"I see you have enlisted Lonnie and Scorpia in your _depraved_ behavior," Shadow Weaver hissed. Catra hadn't heard her come in but she shouldn't have been surprised. It wasn't shocking, it wasn't as though Lonnie and Scorpia could shout to her and get her out in time. She still wasn't sure why they thought that was a good plan, she had tried to tell them it wasn't. It had gotten them into trouble.

" _My_ depravity? You kept these from me! I thought Adora _hated_ me! _You_ made me think that! _You_ made me think that Adora only ever cared about me because I was the best of a _bad_ situation!" Catra was angry enough that she could ignore her tears streaming down her face. She finally saw Shadow Weaver for what she really was; an aging alcoholic woman who loved abusing foster children. She didn't know why she had been so afraid of her. She was nothing. She was _less_ than nothing. 

" _Catra_ , you don't understand," Shadow Weaver's tone stayed even, almost as though she pitied her. It made Catra see red.

"Understand _what_?" She finally couldn't choke back her tears. She let out a frustrated sob, confusion rushing through her as Shadow Weaver shut the door and sat on the bed, beckoning her to sit next to her.

"Sit." It sounded more like a suggestion than a command, something unusual for Shadow Weaver. Catra was surprised she hadn't started hitting Catra immediately. Catra hesitantly took a seat next to her, holding the letters tightly. She was afraid Shadow Weaver would take them away, burn them in front of her just to torture her. She hadn't even gotten to read a single one. 

"I _don't_ understand," Catra croaked, rubbing her eyes. 

"I know, that's _my fault_ child. I kept these from you _not_ because Adora is too good for you. On the contrary, it is the other way around," Shadow Weaver chuckled. 

"Y-you're lying. You've always hated me." 

"I never hated you Catra. You reminded me of myself. Adora has never had to work hard, she's naturally gifted. But you and I? We've had to _fight_ for everything we have. I see how hard you work, you know," she turned to her with a look of admiration. 

"I'm nothing like you. You're old and bitter." 

"Ah, but you _are_ like me. I see your potential, Catra. But I also see how _Adora_ looks at you. I feared you too would give up a dream because someone looked at you with stars in their eyes. I was a lawyer once, you know, I wanted to be a judge one day. But I fell for a romance that seemed like a fairytale on the outside. You see my life now. You're no fool Catra, no one can pull the wool over your eyes. I didn't want the same to happen to you," Shadow Weaver sighed, looking lost in her own world. Catra felt like she was getting lost in it too. Catra remembered seeing a picture of Shadow Weaver and Hordak when they were younger. She had looked so full of hope and happiness next to him. Catra had always wondered when that spark had died.  

"I was a child when you took me in! Why did you treat me like that if you didn't hate me?" 

"I wanted to bring out your potential," Shadow Weaver reached over to stroke Catra's hair, then cupped Catra's face with her hand. Catra couldn't help but lean in. She had wanted her to love her, her entire life she had wanted Shadow Weaver to love her. "I didn't want to tell you yet, I wanted it to be a surprise, but I think now is a perfect time. Look at the letter on the bottom of that stack Catra." Catra pulled away slightly, sliding out the bottom piece of paper from the stack. It wasn't like the others; it had typed lettering and the return address was different, it was from Halfmoon. It used her full name instead of her nickname, which Adora knew better than to ever do. She carefully opened the envelope that had been torn open at the top and unfolded the paper. 

"C'yra, we at Halfmoon School of the Performing Arts are pleased to announce that you have made it through the first stage of the early acceptance process. We would like to schedule an audition time-" Catra couldn't believe what she was reading. Her _dream school_ , the best music school in the country wanted _her_ to audition. She had resigned herself to believe that she didn't get in, that she would have to go to a state school or worse, a community college for at least a few years. When she hadn't received any letter she thought it was over. "When were you planning on telling me?" 

"Your birthday next month. Still plenty of time before the audition _of course_ , but I wanted to get a copy to frame for the living room first. As your _mother,_  I thought I _deserved_ a copy," Shadow Weaver smiled at her and for once it didn't make her feel uncomfortable. Catra couldn't help but smile back, even if shyly. 

"If you want, you still could." Catra had never had anything of hers in the living room, except when she qualified for the Olympics when she was fifteen. Shadow Weaver had taken it down when she hadn't decided to go. She had wanted to spend more time with Adora.

"You should keep it. I can wait until your official acceptance letter, it will look nicer. Of course... No, you wouldn't want that." 

"Want what?" 

"Well, I know quite a few people at Halfmoon. I'm sure I could _perhaps_ get your audition moved up? You and I could go down together, you would be excused from school. Then you could know all the sooner." 

"I would love that, I'll start practicing right away. I won't let you down I promise." 

"I know you won't. But you _must_ promise you won't let Adora distract you. She may be your childhood sweetheart but she is nothing compared to your potential." 

"She won't, I promise. I will work so hard, I swear." Catra moved to hand the letters to Shadow Weaver, much as she didn't want to. She could almost hear Adora call out to her from the pages.

"Keep them. I trust you Catra. Now, I want to hear practicing tonight. Don't disappoint me." Shadow Weaver stroked Catra's arm gently. 

"I won't, I'll start right now," Catra smiled looking back at Shadow Weaver before leaving. 

* * *

  


"You're not _seriously_ falling for this shit are you?" Lonnie had barged into her room despite Catra practically yelling at her that she was practicing. She ignored Lonnie as she kept doing the scales for Allstate. It was months away but she was hoping the audition would be similar. "She's literally _just_ being nice to you because she doesn't want you to date her golden girl." 

"I am fucking busy and I did _not_ invite you in," Catra hissed. 

"Do you _really_ think she was _ever_ going to give you that acceptance letter? She only did that to distract you from _Adora_. She just found a better way of manipulating you," Lonnie scoffed. Catra went still, putting her bass clarinet on its stand. She let out a deep sigh. 

"I'm not stupid Lonnie. I _know_ what she's doing." _But I can't keep myself from longing for her affection and praise all the same._ "Shadow Weaver never cared that I was dedicated to music. I don't think she suddenly got an appreciation for classical music."

"Then what the fuck are you doing?" Lonnie's eyes narrowed in suspicion. 

"Oh, sweet, dumb Lonnie. I'm playing ball. She's giving me the audition she never would have given me if I hadn't confronted her. My skill is enough to get me into that school, I know it is. Then I'll be free of her and Hordak _once and for all_." Part of Catra was screaming that she didn't want that. That part of her was kicking and shouting that she should stay away from Adora so she could have Shadow Weaver's love, even if it was fake. But Shadow Weaver would never hold more of her heart than Adora. Adora would win every time. Catra would die for Adora, she would kill for her. That wasn't going to change any time soon, no matter what she had said to Adora. 

"What about Adora?" Lonnie was watching her expectantly. 

"Well, I already fucked that up on my own, _thanks for reminding me_." 

"Aw, how'd you do that wildcat?" Scorpia had opened the door, barging in and sitting on Catra's bed next to Lonnie, waiting for Catra to spill all her secrets that she kept close to her heart. 

"This is not a fucking story time. Shadow Weaver is going to be pissed if I stop practicing."

"She went out actually, wine club. So you can tell us anything!" Scorpia beamed. Fucking wine club, Catra had forgotten it was tonight. For once she wished Shadow Weaver was home to keep them out of her business.

"You heard her Catra, spill." Lonnie wasn't going to let up, Catra could tell. Lonnie would probably point blank ask Adora what happened if Catra didn't. Lonnie being on the football team was becoming a huge pain in the ass. 

"Ugh fine. We were making out and she stopped which was _annoying_. And she asked what we were and I said we're 'enemies who makeout'. So go ahead and roast me, Lonnie, I know I'm a dumbass." It was still haunting Catra days after it happened. Things seemed better between them, Catra had started leaving things in Adora's locker, stealing some of her fries after it happened. But she was still kicking herself for saying such a stupid thing. All she had been able to think about was Adora rejecting her and she was _not_ about to get rejected while someone straddled her. It would be even more humiliating. 

"You fucking dipshit, you are _ruining_ my life. I have so much money riding on this you little shit." 

"Well, what did she say after that?" Scorpia asked, hope in her eyes. 

"She said we were more like rivals. Then I said whatever helps you sleep at night. Then she asked if I was sure-" 

"Was she sad about it?" Scorpia asked. 

"She seemed, disappointed..." 

"That's because she wants you to _date her_ you dumbass," Lonnie groaned, falling back on the bed. 

"No, she doesn't." 

"Would you believe it if it was on tape?" Scorpia asked. 

"Scorpia, you motherfucking genius!" Lonnie exclaimed, pulling Scorpia into a hug. 

"No!" Catra cried.

"This is happening. I'm not losing $200 to Rogelio just because you're a chicken shit."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm literally Lonnie just screaming that they need to get together. I hope you enjoyed, this chapter was way easier to write. Shadow Weaver being manipulative is way too easy to write, unfortunately.


	15. If It Feels Good Do It

This was _supposed_ to be _easy_. That's what Scorpia kept telling herself, mostly because Lonnie had told her it would be. All she had to do was get Adora admitting she loved Catra on tape. Adora was almost certainly going to get drunk that night; it was the last football game of the season, of their high school careers. Adora didn't have any tests scheduled on Monday or even Tuesday. And most importantly _Catra_ wasn't going to be there. She was going to be away with Shadow Weaver all day for her audition. Lonnie had explained to her that Adora would most likely be sad because of it and would drink. 

Scorpia wanted to feel proud of herself, killing two birds with one stone but she just felt crummy about this. Catra had asked her to look out for Adora while she was gone. Catra had expressed her worries about Adora getting "white girl wasted" at the party, especially since some of the football players were creepy last time. Nothing made Scorpia angrier than people who tried to take advantage of the defenseless. Scorpia couldn't help but feel that this was betraying Catra somehow. Lonnie had told her that this was actively helping Catra. Scorpia _knew_ from experience that helping Catra didn't always mean doing _exactly_ what she wanted. But she would keep her promise to Catra; she would make sure nothing happened to Adora. Keeping her promise to Lonnie would be a challenge even if she was 100% dedicated: Smartphones and her prosthetics were _not_ friends. 

It was proving a challenge to keep up with Adora in the crowded house. Sea Hawk's house was not as spacious as Mermista's and it was making Scorpia realize how large she was. Well, not _realize_ , just remember. People commented on it constantly so she wasn't sure how she could forget, but she managed to. Sometimes Lonnie joked that they had needed to move to a bigger house just for her. Scorpia wasn't the only one who went through a growth spurt though, Rogelio had gotten considerably taller as well. It was making it very difficult to follow Adora through the crowd as the girl downed shots and talked to everyone, dancing her way from person to person. People glared at Scorpia as she tried to push her way through the crowd. It didn't seem to matter that she whispered she was sorry a hundred times. 

"Hey little buddy, don't do that," Scorpia took a bottle of vodka from Adora, cursing under her breath as she dropped it and it smashed. Why did bottles have to be _so_ slippery? At least they were in a spare room and it wasn't likely to be found until the next day.

"Why not?" Adora giggled, face red, "Wow, you're a _big bug_." Adora stumbled forward and Scorpia caught her, holding her up. Adora didn't weigh quite as much as Scorpia had pictured as she lowered her onto a beanbag chair. 

"You're already pretty drunk and I _promised Catra_ I would make sure nothing happens to you. I don't want you throwing up or feeling sick," Scorpia took a seat next to her, though she quickly realized she was too big for the beanbag. 

"Psh, Catra. She _hates_ me," Adora frowned, wiggling around causing a sloshing sound, "Besides, Catra's not even here! I wanna party!" 

"She doesn't hate you. She's just, hard to reach! She doesn't like talking about feelings," Scorpia sighed. She wasn't sure how she was going to keep Adora in one place. She thought about trying to bring her home but she didn't know which house was hers. Yet another reason to spend time with Glimmer. She wished Glimmer was here. She probably was, just off somewhere club snubbing Bow just like they practiced. Glimmer was getting good at it. 

"I'm Sea Hawk, I am, I am. If you want to take a guy for granted? Then I am your man. Unappreciated in all I do. Why can't they see I'm very cool?" A voice came from outside the door before it opened, opening to the parties host crying with a bottle of scotch, "Oh Adora, you're here too. Great, just great! An audience for my _suffering_!" 

"Hey little buddy, I'm going to need you to step away from Adora slowly," Scorpia stepped between them, towering over him. She couldn't remember who this guy was exactly. His family owned the house, he spent lots of time with Mermista. But Scorpia couldn't remember if he was a football player or not and she wasn't about to trust him. 

"W-why?" Sea Hawk was drunk, "She's my friend, we're _friends_." 

"Adora, you two friends?" Scorpia looked over her shoulder. 

"You two are my best friends!" Adora smiled, "Oh Sea Hawk is that scotch? Share!" Adora stumbled between them and took the bottle before gleefully trotting back to her beanbag. 

"I mean that didn't answer my question but ok. Better question, are you on the football team?"

"Who me? No, I'm on the cheer squad with Bow. Never been interested in playing sports. You should be on the football team, if we had to pick between the two of us," Sea Hawk chuckled.

"I've heard that before, mostly about basketball. It's a height thing, I think? But I wouldn't be much good with these arms. Besides, it would get in the way of cooking club and Glimmer and I would never see each other-"

"You're friends with Glimmer? I adore her, she is a good friend of mine!" Sea Hawk interrupted.

"Hmmm, if you're friends with Glimmer and Adora I guess I can trust you. Sit down my dude," Scorpia slapped his shoulder and Sea Hawk let out a small groan of pain. Scorpia went back to her seat next to Adora but decided against trying to take the scotch from her. She didn't want to break another bottle. Sea Hawk sat on one of the bar stools, looking longingly at the scotch. 

"So, you're watching over our friend Adora here I see," Sea Hawk looked like he was struggling to make conversation, but he was drunk enough that it wasn't a surprise. 

"Yeah, Catra asked me to so here I am." 

"Ah, yes. Mermista's friend." 

"Mhmm, Catra's _mean_ ," Adora giggled, falling further into the beanbag. 

"She's _misunderstood_! You of all people should know that!" Scorpia felt exasperated. Catra could be a handful but she was a good person. She was Scorpia's best friend and while she wasn't always the most open, she had good intentions. 

"Well, if she's anything like my Mermista, then she may very well be mean," Sea Hawk sighed. 

"You seem kind of down Sea Hawk. Did something happen with you and Mermista?" Scorpia wanted to help. If she was stuck here with Adora at least she could talk to someone. 

"It's just that I threw this party to impress Mermista but she doesn't want me to hang out with her and her other friends. And it's _my_ party! I just don't understand it, I'm _cool_! Do you think I'm cool?"

"Potentially yeah. I thought you guys were like one of the only couples to stay together a long time at this school. Why wouldn't she want to hang out with you?" 

"We're not together right now, but I thought maybe we were headed back to a patch where we're on again you know? I can just never tell how she _feels_ ," Sea Hawk sniffed. 

"I know how you feel. I'm dealing with this Catra thing where I know how she feels about Adora but she doesn't want to _tell_ Adora. It's hard to be a best friend to someone who doesn't want to talk about feelings you know? And then there's Glimmer. I treat her like a princess, I do everything for her, but all she can think about is Bow going to the dance with Perfuma. That was months ago! I just want her to get to know me but it feels like that's never going to happen." 

"You know, you two are good friends. And good people!" Adora exclaimed, hiccuping. 

"She’s right! I like myself, I don't _need_ their approval!" Sea Hawk stood in defiance. The alcohol had taken hold of Sea Hawk but Scorpia couldn't help feed off it a bit. 

"You're so right! And one day Glimmer is going to see that I'm a good friend, a good hugger, and I won't betray her! And she'll appreciate the things I bake for her because it's hard to bake like this!" Scorpia waved her hands around as she stood as well. 

"You two are my best friends! Well, kind of, _Catra_ is my best friend but I'm in love with her," Adora giggled. Scorpia cursed herself for not having her phone ready. Lonnie was going to be _furious_ when she found out. 

"Do you two want to hang out here? We can have a party, a _cool_ person party! With MarioKart and bean bag chairs!" Sea Hawk declared, looking hopeful. 

"That sounds like way more fun than the party out there, let's do it!" Scorpia smiled.

"Yeah, girl's night in!" Adora squealed, drawing them into a hug. 

 

* * *

 

"What are you doing?" Catra leaned in the doorway, taking in the scene before her. Sea Hawk and Scorpia were furiously playing what sounded like MarioKart while Adora was passed out in a beanbag chair. At least Scorpia was watching her and kept her away from the action. The party had disintegrated into something _really_ weird. She had seen at least ten kids trying to do the cinnamon challenge, which itself was ancient and should have died _ages_ ago. Catra didn't even want to know what was going on upstairs if that's what they were doing downstairs.

"Catra! I thought you weren't going to be able to make it!" Scorpia jumped up from her seat to hug her. Catra cringed as Scorpia put her arms around her. 

"I didn't think I would be able to but I don't think Shadow Weaver was too excited about potentially spending _another_ night with just me. We just got home, I came to see how you are faring. Seems like you have it handled." 

"She was a _little_ difficult in the beginning but she settled down nicely. It was easier than taking care of Timmy I'll tell you!" Scorpia beamed. Catra could only nod in agreement, thinking about the few times she had been forced to watch that terror of a baby. He was the equivalent of the baby from the Incredibles movies. 

"Catra! When did you get here, I missed you so much!" Adora had woken up and drunkenly started walking towards her, then hung herself on Catra, "Wow you look nice, you're all dressed up. Oh no, I didn't miss the band concert did I?" Adora was clutching onto her for dear life, tears welling up in her eyes.

"No Adora, that's next week. You're drunk again I see," Catra chuckled. 

"I just missed you, this party sucked," Adora whined, running one of her hands through Catra's hair. She pushed herself closer to Catra, making her embarrassed. 

"I think you've had enough partying for one night, Adora. Thanks for watching her Scorpia, you're a lifesaver, I owe you. Come on Adora, I'm going to take you home." Catra didn't like owing anyone but if there was someone she had to be in debt to she was glad it was Scorpia. Catra hoisted Adora up and Adora wrapped her legs around her waist. 

"No problem, it's what we do in the best friend trio! Are you sure you don't want me to help you carry her home? It's no trouble." 

"Nah, I got this. Have fun with Sea Hawk, I'll see you tomorrow," Catra left through the door and started weaving her way through the crowd that was still gathered in the kitchen. As she was passing through Adora started running both hands through her hair. As they neared the door Catra saw Adora's sister. 

" _What_ are you _doing_?" Glimmer demanded. 

"Glimmer! When did you get here? Have you met my new friend? She's just as pretty as Catra, it's _crazy_!" Adora giggled. 

"I'm taking her home because you let her get drunk again Sparkles. You should probably watch her better. She's not the sharpest tack in the drawer you know," Catra rolled her eyes. Suddenly she thought of how she could pay back Scorpia as she hoisted Adora a little higher. "By the way, Scorpia thinks you're cute. You should give her a chance or not your call, just thought I'd let you know. She's in the game room with Sea Hawk if you're interested." Catra opened the front door and marched out, not waiting for Glimmer's response. She did the best she could do for Scorpia given the circumstances. But she was pretty sure Sparkles liked her back. 

"You're like _so_ pretty," Adora giggled, "Don't tell Catra." 

"Don't tell Catra _what_ dummy?" Catra couldn't help but find her amusing. She was even drunker than the last time. 

"That you're just as pretty! She would get jealous. Maybe I should go on a date with you strange lady, do you have a girlfriend?" 

"No, I don't have a girlfriend," Catra tried to suppress a laugh but she was failing. 

"What? But you're so pretty?" Adora's eyes were wide. 

"I don't know, this girl named Catra sounds like a knockout too," Catra teased. 

"She is! She's so confident and smart and really funny! And her eyes!" Adora started flailing a bit in her excitement. Catra almost lost her balance.

"Then why don't you date Catra?" 

"She doesn't wanna. She said we're "enemies who make out". I don't wanna be enemies who make out you know? I want her to go to dances with me and cuddle me and hold my hand..." Adora trailed off. Catra's comment was coming back to bite her. This was starting to make Catra uncomfortable because Adora was drunk. She didn't want her. 

"Well, I'm going to tell her that you think I'm prettier." 

"No!" Adora cried. 

"I'm gonna," Catra chuckled. Adora pulled back a little bit. 

"Wait, _you're_ Catra! Catra when did you get here?" 

"I've been here the whole time you big dummy. You need to stop drinking so much." 

"Then you need to come to more parties," Adora pouted.

"Psh, you were drunk at the last one I was at!" Catra laughed.

"That's cuz you basically dared me! You were being all hot and snarky and I wanted to show you I'm cool. I'm like so cool Catra!" 

"Didn't you tell me that you don't have to drink to have a good time," Catra rolled her eyes. 

"Ugh, you're teasing me," Adora pulled away, frowning at Catra. 

"Guilty," Catra chuckled, pushing Adora upwards again. She didn't have very far to go thankfully, Sea Hawk and Adora's houses were only a few blocks away. She was stronger than she remembered, maybe it was all the band equipment she had been lifting. Adora was still heavy but she wasn't struggling to hold onto her. Adora reached down and kissed Catra on the cheek. 

"There, now we're even," Adora declared. Her smile was so wide that Catra didn't have the heart to tell her it didn't make any sense. 

"Yep, you got me. I'm mortified."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to do the whole thing from Scorpia's perspective but I can't imagine being that pure so I just couldn't lol. I hope you enjoyed! I got a lot of energy from the season 3 trailer. Next chapter is a Glimmer perspective! These are kind of like bonus chapters but they're important to me.


End file.
